I have spent a great deal of time blogging the past few years. I have used this site and others like it as a place to process, share and sometimes amuse. I have created this "Pirate" persona that a few of you seem to genuinely like.
The Bible says that to everything there is a season. A friend of mine sent me an email today that reminded me of that very thing. I feel that the season for my blogging has past. I do not have the passion for it that I once had.
So, tonight, I am sitting here at my computer and I am going to debunk the myth of "The Pirate in the City". Once I come clean you will wonder why you ever liked me, read me or were ever interested in anything I had to say.
I have been in prison. I never told you the entire story. I guess tonight is as good a time as any to come clean and let you know the real me and what really happened.
I was on probation for a variety of offenses. I had gone through a really fucked up period in my life many years earlier. So, because of that the story I am going to relay to you I was unable to defend myself.
I am a sex addict. I have been to groups. I have tried all sorts of treatments. The primary reason all of my relationships fail is because I cannot keep it zipped. For a while, my biggest addiction was Internet Porn. I spent hours surfing around looking for something new and different.
In February of 2000 I was surfing porn at work. I was browsing yahoo groups and one of the groups I surfed had some very disturbing images. There were two child porn pictures on the site. At the moment on of those images was on the screen, one of the other department managers walked into my office and saw it. he reported it to the owner and on the weekend they checked my hard drive. I had not downloaded or saved anything. However, the images were saved in the cache memory of my computer. They called the sex crimes unit of the town I worked and reported the site and me. The next day, Valentines Day 2000, I went to work and was arrested and charged with Possession of Child Pornography. Since there was 2 images, I was charged with 2 felony counts.
I probably could have beaten the case in a trial. However, to get to a trial meant the judge was going to give me 10 years for the probation violation. So, to shorten the sentence, I agreed to a series of 5 year sentences, all to run concurrent. Now, I am registered sex offender in the State of Texas. Because I have two cases, I am required to register every 90 days.
I had to call Amy from jail and tell her that I had been arrested for child pornography.
A few years later, she received another call. I guess it was in the middle of the night or early in the morning saying I was in intensive care in Bayshore Hospital because of an overdose of sleeping pills, psych meds and tequila. The reason I tried to kill myself that time was because I had written 5 checks on my fathers account for about $2500 and had just been kicked out of his house.
The next January, she got another call from me where I came out to her.
There were many other calls at different times. Those are some of the biggies. I just thought all you should know who it really was that you are dealing with here.
The cyclone Chris has passed through many lives. It, me, I leave nothing but heartache and destruction in my wake.
Because of the things I have done, my daughter had to live with her grandparents and my wife had to go through pregnancy alone. I had no contact with my daughter until she was almost 4 1/2 years old. That isn't necessarily the truth either. I had been violating my parole and seeing her. When they decided to polygraph all of the sex offenders to see if they were violating, I came clean to my counselor. When confronted with it, I once again tried to pass the buck and blamed Amy's parents saying they thought I should do anything to see my daughter. That was another phone call she received, my parole officer calling her parents house.
That is me. That is the "Pirate". I am not a nice guy or a good person. This is my very last post on MyBloggers or any other blog site. It is not necessary for you to comment unless you would like to express outrage. I am not going to respond and I am never posting another blog.
I wish all of you the very best. I have enjoyed getting to know many of you.
There is nothing I can ever do to make amends to Amy, M, my parents, her parents or any of you.
Goodbye.