My family, ie mother and sisters are still going out of their way to make me feel like something they have stood on.
One sister was running in a road race yesterday. I called, and left a message on Friday night to wish her well and find out what time she expected to be on the course for us to visit.......no reply! I tried again on Saturday and left the same message ........ still no reply! I put a message on her Bebo page to wish her well - ok so she hasn't been on there for a few days so her failure to reply was no surprise. I also sent a text message yesterday to wish her well.....and it was a real shocker.....no REPLY!!! I have since heard that she ran a good time but I will NOT be calling her I will wait till she posts it on her BEBO page! I also have caller id so can leave a freakin' message and not hear back for awhile - I am obviously assuming she will infact call me ... I won't hold my breath!
It was such a lovely day yesterday that DH and I decided we would take a run and visit my mum. There was an extra church service in the small Kirk she is a trustee of (she helped raise funds to save it from demolition) yesterday. We didn't get up in time for the service but went to meet her as she came out. She was looking after my sister's two kids (the one that ran) and to say she looked pissed to see us was an understatement. Half the problem was probably because we weren't at the service. We would have been if my accident prone son hadn't tripped and smacked his face off a paving stone!
WE got the distinct impression that she was desperate to go home and she asked what we were doing. I told her that we'd promised the boys they could go to the play park for a bit. With this my nephew also wanted to come - well if looks could kill! My mother was spitting fire! I don't see the big deal as she was only going home to make my dad a cup of tea because the lazy arse can't boil  a freakin' kettle (that is a whole other story).
To the park we went. She then asked what we were doing for tea. I said we hadn't given it much thought but might go home and shove the BBQ on. We were informed that she had booked a table at the hotel (the play park we were in was right beside it) and we could see if they could fit us in too. DH and I thought why not, we hadn't had a nice meal out for ages.
We all headed back to her house for a cup of tea. If I had realised the time I would have stayed where we were as we only had time to stay there for twenty minutes before heading back to the hotel for our tea.
We were at the hotel first. Where we parked there was room for my sister and my mum's car next to us but they chose to park further away from the main door. We headed straight in and were shown to the table. My sister wasn't going to be coming so I moved the high chair up a bit so there was space beside me.
When they finally came in they all walked past the table and asked to be seated - there is no way that they didn't see us - fcuk me she looked at us! They also made a thing about extra chairs already being added to the table for us. When they did come over J asked my sister where she was going to sit and she replied that she was waiting for a chair and a place to be set. I said that there was a space beside me as I'd moved the high chair - but I was ignored, I repeated myself but it still fell on deaf ears. Both DH and I got the impression that they couldn't sit further from us if they tried. The conversation never came our way and when it did my mum asked DH if he took sandwiches to his work - WTF?! There is making small talk and there is just talking sh!te!
I was ignored on several other occassions by my mum, sister and my dad. It wouldn't have been quite so bad if I had just opened my mouth and spoken and for them not to have heard me but each of them had asked me a direct question and then as soon as I went to speak they turned and spoke to someone else! DH was for getting up and walking at this point. But that would have caused a scene, upset the boys and we needed to eat.
What we have learned from this is that we will never put ourselves in  that position again - yes we added ourselves to the party, but so did my sister and yet we were the ones that were made to feel that we had crashed the party. Both DH and I keep thinking what we can possibly have done to deserve this. DH even thinks it is him and has now said that he won't go and see them again - if I want to go I go alone! Thus makes me very sad as even when I am on my own the freakin' ignore me, at least when he is there I have someone to talk to!
Sometimes I think they punish us for not going out and palming our children off on them to babysit. One thing for certain is that my youngest sister won't be asked as she severly punished my oldest son when we last went to the pictures (nearly two years ago now). He was toilet training and was still a bit hit or miss. Well I think he had 3 wet accidents and a solid one - she decided that was unacceptable and had him on the naughty step at one point, banished to his room another time and I wouldn't put it past her if she rubbed his nose in it! I know for a fact she is not like that with my neice and nephew!
I wrote the other week about how I had spoke to mum about the way she and my sisters make me feel. This is the first thing we have done together since then and it has been worse than ever!!
What do I do now? I am going to ignore all calls for a start and see what happens.