For me its time, again, to talk a bit about an issue what always bothers me. The most difficult part of your inner life sometimes is: "how to get along with your feelings". When you feel 100% happy then you ARE happy I guess. When something is bothering you somewhere "deep inside" then its impossible to feel completely happy.
The best thing to do is coming out with all your feelings, both the happy and the sad ones. If you don't or, like in my case, you cant, there always will remain some unhappiness. It doesn't matter if you cant come out with happy or with less happy feelings. Not being able to come out with them makes you feel a bit unhappier. Lets call them the difficult things of life.
I don't want to look like I am unhappy btw cause I am rather happy right now, just not for 100%. At home all things are great and my feelings for "that special person" just are so intense that they make me melt inside. Point is I cant express those intense feelings at home cause they are part of me that I keep "hidden".
Its not good to have a "hidden" part for your being completely happy, but I cant act different at the moment. Some of you might say: come out with it (because of your feeling not completely happy), but I still cant, cause of circumstances here.
I will manage I am sure, it just is a pity that life cant always be what you want for 100%. Sorry to bother you again with this (its all said before...) its just still keeps me busy and writing about it helps.