Do something for me, will you?

Think of all the people and other animals that you love. Then, make a list of the top ten people/things that you love, and list them in the order of intensity that you love them, and make no distinction between whether they are human or non-human.  The only criteria is that they are living creatures that you know personally.

Okay?

Now, look at the list and rationalize why you love them.

The concept for this blog came from a discussion Mary Ellen and I had last night. She asked me who do I love the most and why, and she was . . . surprised, to say the least, with the results that she got from me.

Her top ten list was comprised entirely of relatives – me, children, grandchildren, siblings, etc.

Mine was not.

Mine included her at the top of the list, and then a number of relatives, friends, and animals.

What was the criteria that needed for a creature to become a part of the list?

For hers, I’m not quite sure.

For mine, it was, in part, reciprocation.

In other words, if I love you and show you that I do, and you show me at least the slightest interest in return, you go up a couple of notches on my love list.

So, on my top ten list, there are relatives, like my children and grandchildren. There are also friends and even pets.

Some pets and many friends, much to Mary Ellen’s amazement, rank, in my estimation, above some of my close relatives.

Now, let me not be misunderstood; I’m not saying that in order for me to love you, you have to love me in return.  That’s not so. What I am saying is that I have a tendency to love people more who show their love for me, and these people rank higher on my list of who is important in my life.

Just because you are a relative doesn’t ensure you a high position, or any position at all, for that matter, on my list. Nobody gets into the single digits strictly by the composition of their bloodline. And, for that matter, just because you are a human being doesn’t do it either.

On Mary Ellen’s list, if you are a relative, you occupy a spot somewhere near the top, just by virtue of your birth, even if you ignore her constantly or continually sleight her. And, though she is a dye-in-the-wool animal lover with a special penchant for horses, even her beloved Hoo Horse falls below every human being on her list.

Not so with me.  My wife, my kids and my grandkids all rank right at the top, with Mary Ellen way out in the lead. However, my friends, particularly my theater friends who often show me that they love me with actions and words, come next. And some friends and relatives even may fall behind my Fritz The Dog.

I have little or no love for my mother. Because of her, I had to spend years in therapy to start feeling good about myself again.  (She was extremely abusive, physically and emotionally.) One of the shrinks even told me that he understood completely why I didn’t want her in my life. He also told me that it was perfectly understandable why I didn’t love her.

Do I hate her? No. 

Do I love her? No.

Will I miss her if anything should happen to her? No.

Is there a place for her on my love list? What do you think?

My dog Fritz, on the other hand, loves me.  He makes a big deal about it every time he sees me. I’ve had dog trainers say that he would lay down his life for me. When I walk around the house, he follows me from room to room and lays down at my feet when I sit.  He just wants to be with me. When he sees me pull in the driveway after being at work all day, he goes absolutely nuts with excitement!

He makes me laugh. 

He makes me feel good.

Does he have a place on my love list? Of course! Above a lot of humans.

So, what do you think?

Do you have a love list?

Who is on it?

What criteria is needed for somebody to be on it?

Are family members automatically on it?

Are there animals on it?

Do animals rank above some people?

Whaddaya think?