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What Happens in Vegas ... (Part 1)
What Happens in Vegas ... (Part 1)
I just returned from my second time to Las Vegas, and Mary Ellen and had an ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC time there! However, to be perfectly honest, I STILL don’t see the infatuation with the place.
Granted, I’m not a gambler. Gambling bores me, and I’ve only won at it once. And then, I didn’t even know I won until Mary Ellen told me! (Also, I’m not very lucky when it comes to games of chance. I’d be better off just putting my money in pile on the floor, dousing the pile with gasoline, and throwing a lit match on it.)
Here is an example of my gamlbing prowess:
We were in a casino out here two years ago waiting for Mary Ellen’s son Rich, and his wife Melanie, to show up. I was leaning against a machine for a while. Then, I turned and noticed that the machine was a penny slot machine. Bored, I decided to play it for a while. So I fed a dollar into thing, and started pushing the button. The three pictures would roll and roll and then stop, then I’d push the button again. After doing this five times, I pushed the button again, and nothing happened. The machine wouldn’t work. I thought it jammed. I turned to Mary Ellen and said, "I think I broke the freaking thing."
She looked at it, and said, "Jim. You won something!"
I did?
No bells. No whistles. No flashing lights. No coins noisily dropping into the tray. Just…nothing.
So somebody showed me how to "cash out," and the machine printed me out a paper receipt that I took up to a cashier station. I made $114 on a $0.05 investment! Not bad.
Did I play any more?
Nope.
This time out there, I gambled all of $1.00 once again. That’s it. I was in the Golden Nugget on Fremont, and I had just ordered a beer at the bar. As I waiting, I looked down and saw a video blackjack game in front of me. I put a dollar into it, pushed the button three times…and that was the end of that.
So, seeing as how I am not enamoured with gambling…excuse me…"Gaming" I believe it the proper, less offensive term for it now-a-days, maybe I’m not the most qualified person to speak to about the city.
Also, I’m not a big show person. I mean, theater, yes! I’ll go see a good drama or comedy any day of the week. But magicians and Blue Man Group? (I’ve seen Blue Man Group on public television, and, I must admit, the pyrotechnics and stuff are quite a spectacle!) They’d all be fun and interesting to watch, but not for $225 a ticket.
Nope. I’m not into it that much.
Nor am I into idol worship.
There is no living human being or group of human beings that I admire that much. Sorry.
We went to the National Rodeo Finals (50th Anniversary) on the second night of our vacation. Mary Ellen’s son Rich, his wife Mel, and three other friends joined us.
First, we all went out to dinner to Jimmy Buffett’s Margaritaville on The Strip. It was excellent as always!
I am truly a Parrothead. I think I own every record (CD, for you younger folks), that Jimmy Buffet ever recorded.
You know, for years I have said that there is nobody on this planet with whom I would want to trade lives, and that is true. I LOVE my life, as those who know me personally or who read this blog already know.
However, if somebody put a gun to my head and said I had to choose somebody to switch lives with, it would be Mr. Buffet.
I mean, here is a talented guy who, by the looks of things, spends his life just having fun. He pretends to be a total hedonist. (However, if you listen closely to the lyrics that he writes, you understand that the most important things in his life are people – particularly his daughter "Little Miss Magic! Whatcha gonna be?") He makes his living by doing what he loves – singing and playing guitar. If he ever decides that needs more money, he simply plans another national tour.
I had never been to a rodeo before, and, to be honest, it was exciting, but the excitement was diminished for me by the lack of concern of the spectators for the animals.
For instance, in order to get the bucking broncos and bulls to buck so much, a cinch-strap (called a "buckin g strap") is wrapped around the midsection of the animals and pulled. It is this strap that causes the animal to buck like crazy. The instant the strap is removed after the ride, the animal stops acting crazy, and it settles right down.
Another thing that bothered me a bit was something I noticed during the calf roping competitions. A couple of the calves, when roped around the neck, spun around so violently that one of their hind hooves got caught up in the rope. To me, the contortions that these animals went through looked painful.
I heard a couple of rodeo fans behind me let out audible moans when they saw this, and, at first I thought they were pitying the poor critters. Then, I realized that they were simply feeling sorry for the cowboy who lost a few sections in the competition because he had to untangle the back feet of the calf before he could tie legs together with another length of the rope.
However, the discomfort that these animals felt was minimal, and it only lasted for a few moments. Most of their lives are spent in open pastures where they can run and graze freely for most of their lives.
As during the last time here in Vegas, I was totally amazed at the blatant sex that is EVERYWHERE! I mean, why do women put up with this stuff??!! I see sensible women having dinner and drinks in places where other women are parading around in less than underwear, promoting shows where they are nakedly "acting" in extremely sexually suggestive and degrading manners. And yet these women who are patrons of these establishments just seem to accept this degradation of these women, and, in my mind, of ALL women, as a fact of life! I’m truly amazed by this. It just seems so hypocritical!
Las Vegas is a city that is based on the Disney model of the world. Everything here is fake. Everything. It is all glitz and smoke. There is a Statue of Liberty here that is about 1/10 the size of the real one. There is an Eiffel Tower here that is a one-third scale of the original. You can take a gondola ride in The Venetian, but the gondoliers are not really guiding the boats. Each boat is on an underwater track and motorized.
The interior of The New York, New York Casino, is built to resemble streets in NYC. Inside The Paris, everything is built to look like you are walking down Parisian Streets. This is all, of course, with the exception of the ever-present gambling tables and slot machines.
My suggestion? If you want to go to Paris, go to Paris and see the real things and meet the real people. If you want to go to NYC, do it, and again, meet the real McCoys! For most of us, it would not be that much more expensive to do it and experience the genuine articles than to come to Las Vegas and experience the fakes.
Nothing is real in Vegas. Nothing, including the sexuality of the place.
posted on Dec 15, 2008 7:07 AM ()
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So, did you have fun in the "fake city"? I kind of like Vegas. I think that's where Elvis used to perform. I also like the food there. I also got married there... as everyone knows, in jeans. We didn't win anything like $114. We only spent a dollar, too. 
That kinda "Entertainment" TRULY pisses me off. 
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