Dottie Riley


Dottie Riley
Brandon, FL
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Life & Events > Relationships > Stressed



I have been feeling poorly for the past two weeks. Severe muscle aches (neck, back and arms), indigestion, constipation, inability to sleep, and a headache like I never before experienced. The headache is the worst part. For a few days it was so intense that could do nothing of consequence. I finally had to concede that this is stress.

I don't know what to say about my son that I never said before. I think I am this stressed because the veil of denial has truly dropped and I realize... too many things.

I will get over this too. It will take time and healing. While he has abused me for many years, it has only been two weeks since I truly grasped the depth of his hatefulness. I don't even want a relationship with him anymore. That feeling is so strong that I am reluctant to engage with my grandsons whom I cannot talk to except through him. I will endure what I must for their sake, but I see no reason to have unnecessary conversations with Michael.

posted on July 17, 2014 11:03 AM ()


I hope you will seriously consider joining a support group with others struggling to adjust with being alienated from an adult child. I think it would a healing help and support for you. HUGS!
comment by marta on July 19, 2014 8:03 AM ()
Did not know that there were such groups. Will have to see if one is around here.
reply by dragonflyby on July 19, 2014 10:34 AM ()
It is wondrous that you've been carrying this burden but produced so much lovely artwork. There's clearly a vibrant spirit in you that should come back with rest and healing.
comment by drmaus on July 18, 2014 1:43 PM ()
Thank you! The past few years have taken their toll. I produce less and really need to paint more.
reply by dragonflyby on July 19, 2014 10:36 AM ()
I can remember when I realized there was no hope for my relationship with my sister. I had been telling myself that she'd get over it, or we'd see each other at a family event and things would be okay - not great, but not horrible. But then it finally got through to me that there is nothing there - she has some kind of deep grudge, and there is nothing that will ever change that; she simply cannot stand me, and everything I say and do irritates the heck out of her, and anything I do reinforces her hatred. It's a sad realization - like a death in the family.
comment by troutbend on July 17, 2014 9:05 PM ()
Exactly! This truly feels like a death.
reply by dragonflyby on July 17, 2014 11:21 PM ()
It is important for you to find a way to relax. If you Google "meditation for stress", you will get many responses for guidance through meditation practices. Even 10 minutes a day can help. You have to turn to your inner world for the answer. You are now dealing with a reality you have fought against. That is the hardest thing to do. We're in your corner.
comment by tealstar on July 17, 2014 7:01 PM ()
The saddest part is that I have spent more than 30 years in denial. I can't blame him for that. I did that- all by myself. I am seriously working on relaxing- like meditation, soft music, deep breathing, etc.
reply by dragonflyby on July 17, 2014 11:24 PM ()
Dottie, stress can really take a toll on your body but have these symptoms
checked. They could be symptoms of serious illness. I have been stressed a
lot lately and I find exercise is my friend. I simply walk until I am
comment by elderjane on July 17, 2014 3:38 PM ()
I am sure it is stress although I am overdue to see my doctor...
reply by dragonflyby on July 17, 2014 11:25 PM ()

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