Me: "the kitchen of the guest cabin smells like a skunk died under the floor and now I'm seeing what looks like young flies all over the place inside."

Him: [silence]

Me: "when we had the dead squirrel in the den last year, how long did it take from when the smell started to when all those flies showed up?"

Him: "I don't know."

Me: "well! CSI Las Vegas would know!"

Him: "Yes they would."

Watching a Walmart ad about 100% ground beef:
Me: "That pink slime they put in ground beef is still meat, it's just squeezed within an inch of its life."

Him: [nod]

RE: the Memorial Day holiday:

Me: "tomorrow's another free day."

Him: "Sleep in"

Me: "Except you - you have to get up at 5 something to put out the bird feeders at first daylight. How much earlier do you have to set your alarm each day?"

Him: "With this equinox, it is about a minute and a half a day earlier, and gets shorter as we get nearer the solstice...it's about half a minute a day is the way it works out. and the other equinox in September it'll be about a minute and a half the other way."

Him: "The bears don't care if it's dark or light, do they?"

Me: "No, but it makes us feel like we are doing something to put the feeders out when we can see them. The bears haven't figured that out yet."