So once again, I was talking to women on the "internet". I was "single" I was on the "rebound". I'd already met a half dozen or so online. Slept with them all.

I was "VERY" hurt over losing my "first wife" (of 13 years). I personally didn't understand it. My actions at this point "I will not justify. I was a "Hurting man", a very confused hurting man. I had just bought a new home. A home for me and my family. I guess I just thought, I was doing "right" and we'd be together forever.

I felt her "new pastor of the Pentacostal church she joined was driving her away. He was teaching my kids that "If you don't speak in "tongues" you don't have God in you. Your going to Hell. Now from my perspective, she was in a cult. The pastor even has claimed to raise people from the "dead". To me, he was "stealing my family".

I took my car. I did a major fucking lawn job at that church. I got out, and "flipped the muther fucking pastor off". Think I even told him to "Suck my dick". What I was trying to do was "protect my family". I did just the opposite. All I did was push my wife away. Now both her and my kids believe his crap.

My wife "eventually" left. It was "13 years" together. And no I wasn't a bad person. We even get along great today. They are all in a "cult" thing now.. I know this. There isn't lots that that will stop me in a situation like this. I ran out of ways to change the situation.

So once she left, I turned to the "internet" to meet women. At this point, I was "major" fucked in the head. I lost everything that meant anything to me. I wasn't worried about the "house or anything" that stuff really doesn't mean much. I actually kept the house and kids for the next "6" years. But my family was "broken".

So I was chatting to all these "women" online. I just needed an "outlet". For me that was kinda "sex". Companionship. Something like that.

I didn't even want a "girlfriend", I wanted "sex". I still loved my wife. Yet I needed to "fulfill" a need. Everything I felt I lacked from my wife, I wanted to find in another.

Me and my wife had sex "every single day" for 13 years. If not more often. She was/is an extremely pretty woman. To this day (now over 40) she could still be a model. But her ideas on "sex" weren't mine. She kinda felt "sex" was bad, but felt "obligated" at the same time. With her, it was 99% Missionary position. Me I kinda wanted more.

I went to the internet, basically looking for what I never had at home. To be honest, that was "Hard core kinky sex". I didn't want a "relationship". I still loved my now missing wife. I never pushed her for anything she didn't want, never would. All those years of "Bible study" meant nothing to me then. I felt the "church people fucked me, and my wife stole my family and started fucking some other dude". Everything the Bible was supposed to be about, was now backwards.

I slept around alot, for awhile. Mostly "one night stands". Then I met a woman "nicknamed SUNNY".

Sunny was a "Sensory Processing Therapist". This meant she wanted to learn "Sensory Processing" between "Human beings". At that point, it fit me quite well. She was actually a legal professional.

Sunny actually "Wanted" to be tied up on the bed all day. Gagged, spanked.. all that. Sunny didn't "just want to try it" she wanted it all day long. I am talking "12 hours" or more. If I wasn't able to function again, she wanted objects. She wanted to try "saran wrapped". I mean like everything. In the end, she was "another" one of my greatest sexual experiences. But I got rid of her. I still loved my wife, who I would never have again.

Ya know what's funny. I could go "right" down the list of women I "slept" with during my off season. Over "half" of them were legal professionals. The "least likely you think you'd have a chance to "nail" are all "over your ass"! especially being me.. the way I look, the way I act. Who would think "nurses and therapists" would wanna fuck me? Yet, they were all over.

I wasn't happy with "Sunny". Nor was I with alot of other women I've been with. For the most part, I got rid of them. Some got rid of me.

I am Happy with "Roxann" mostly. I don't see us breaking up anytime soon. I find her "Pretty", but nothing close to my first wife. We get along "FAR BETTER" and the important part is how you "interact" as a couple.

Gary