I'm a little lost right now, well I'm happy but I'm not I have everything that I want well just about everything but a man to make me happy and hold me and to show me how much he cares about me and help me through the hard times I may have, I was with someone for just about 3yrs and then he broke up with me and it didn't help that he was over sea's either thou, I know he cared about me a lot because if he didn't he wouldn't give me a ring for Christmas or he wouldn't still tell me how much he still cares about me and wants to be with me and all that stuff if he didn't care about me and tells me that he knows he messed up and how we need to talk when he gets home or he wouldn't sent me a text sayin "you know what? i've though about this a long time. i dont wanna see you hurt, but i cant see you with anyone. so maybe i still want/need you. wait for me and we'll talk" thats what he all had to say to me and yes he was drinking that night he sent that to me but I know he ment it because I still know him on the back of my head, but whatever about that I can talk more about that some other time, this blog is about other stuff right now lol, well I'm happy with my life well kinda but the only thing is Im lost and I just don't know what to do right now, I want a guy that makes me happy, and yes I still love my ex, but he hurt me once and I dont want that to happen again, and here's the thing I met different guys and I fell in love with the one but he's like 10yrs older then me and I just don't know about him because it seems like he trys to walk a way from everything that trys to comes to him and help him out or something that will make his life better or something like that or whatever you want to call that and the thing is we dated for like 5 days and then he broke up with me because he thought my dad was going to go after him and my dad didnt care and another thing that was bugging him was he though I was going to go back to my ex once he got home for good but I told him over and ove that it wasnt going to happen but whatever then the next thing I know he went back home to where he was from because he was working for my dad so he was living with my dad and what not and then the next thing I know he told me that is was going to work out for him and I because he didnt know if he was going to come back or not, so then a few weeks later I met someone else though my best friend and he seems cool and fun to hang out with and who knows maybe even to date or whatever you want to call it lol, and my one sister found out so then she went and told the last guy I was seeing or the guy that was working for my dad whatever you want me to call it lol, and that pissed me off because I'm not even dating this guy I have only been talking to him I havent slept with him or anything so I dont see what the problem is, and it just pissed me off because he was all telling me that I have a boyfriend and what not and then he all told me that he had a girlfriend and I know he doesn't because he's scared to have one and what not lol but who knows, any who, what I really want to talk about is this guy that I met, I really want to hang out with him and get to know him and what not but the thing is he tells me that he doesnt want to drive any where so if i want to hang out with him or anything I would have to find a way down there or something like that I guess but in my eyes I think it goes both ways, because if I'm right he wants to hang out to and all that good stuff I guess but whatever works, and the one night he was going to come and see me but then he never did and I dont know why he didnt and the funny thing is he doesnt live that far away from my dads place so I dont see why he couldnt drive and come see me but whatever I guess but still, I still think it should go both ways, I have no clue what I would have to do, I have seen or noticed that most guys I met will talk to me for a few days and thats it and Im getting sick of it and it suck its like come on, or they will use me or something stupid like that and it gets old and I just dont know what to do, I just want someone that make me happy and have someone to talk to all the time and will listen to me when I talk and the reason I say that is because there is some peopl out there that dont really listen to me when I talk because I can talk alot lol just because, I have no clue... I just dont know what to do, I wish I knew what to do.... all I want is someone that makes me happy and that doesn't try to use me or hurt me in any way because I have been there way to may times then I will be happy