When I was growing up we always watched the local news. Anytime it could be on, it would be on in our house. Back then that meant a half hour news broadcast at meal times and a half hour soft news program at 5. Even then, I thought that was a lot of news. But as the years wore on, local news stations have gone insane with the amount of local news coverage. Each local station is now competing with each other to have the most news. Now it's common to have around 7 hours of local news programming each day.

Do we really need all that news? It's not as if they are filling these broadcasts with new items. Every "local news" is the same. It begins by showing the skyline of the major city in the region and then begins to tell about all the crime that happened in that city. Are people really watching this garbage?

I turn it on and hear about crime in the city. Daily murder's here, stabbings there, gang violence, rape, rape, rape. This goes on for 15 minutes. This seems to confirm a lot of people's notion that big cities are bad and suburbia is a flawless paradise.

Fifteen minutes later the broadcast switches to weather. This is when the doom and gloom of the news directly affects the day. How a passing shower could ruin your afternoon activities.

A commercial break then follows which will advertise the local Chevy, Honda, Toyota, and Ford dealerships. A man will be screaming about 0.5% APR financing and 100 dollar a month leases on the Ford Focus. After these commercials, the viewer will be used to the loud screaming when the sportscaster takes camera. The former high school jock will shout after repeated clips of slams/shots/scores and steroids flash on the screen. Just when you think he's out of breath, he'll whip out a montage of plays, passes, and punts set to 90s Jock Jams.

The last 15 seconds of the program is reserved for soft news. Because by now you are scared as shit to enter downtown for fear of getting shot, that your jog after work will be rained on (acid rain of course because of global warming and pollution), and your ears hurt from the sportscaster yelling like a crazy man. Before you switch the channel, or in many cases see another half hour segment of the "local news," you will get to enjoy that brief story of how Grandpa Mitch's cat can do a back flip while tying your shoelace.

And this is what makes news today in many local TV Markets in America.