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Lifeinthegaylane

Life & Events > Relationships > Is Honesty the Best Policy?
 

Is Honesty the Best Policy?

“At the end of the day, the best thing to do for your friends is to be honest ….. You just have to hope that your honesty doesn’t make them realize something they didn’t want to know.”

- J.D.

If you haven’t seen Scrubs yet … it’s one hilarious show to watch. I’ve recently been watching reruns on Comedy Central (but not the new ones on NBC yet) and I love hearing the narrations from J.D. … they’re quite insightful when you really think about them.

I’m the type of person who reflects on life, my own and other people’s. It’s just me, so I cannot fight it nor change that about me.

Anyways, the above quote got me thinking about honesty with the people in my life, whether it be with close friends, co-workers and even family. People always say, “Honesty is the best policy”, but how true is that?

I’ll admit … the truth hurts … it hurts your ego, it hurts your emotions, it hurts your relationship with friends. But in the end, you can only hope that it’ll make you a stronger person.

You never how the other person will react when they hear it. Granted some may already know, but it might be awkward to hear it aloud for the first time or even from someone close to them.

I’m usually honest with people and hope they’re the same with me. Granted I can be quite frank when the time comes. An example was with my friend Nat, long story short … she blew me off a couple of times when we were suppose to get together and that got me upset.

When I saw her finally I was honest with the way I felt. Granted I could have kept it to myself, been fake and made it seem like it was all right, and go our merry way. She’s a close friend and to be fake with her would be unfair to both of us.

I remember telling this story to a friend of mine and he seemed surprised that I was honest with her. In my head I was thinking, “Well yeah, what was I suppose to do? Say nothing and pretend that she didn’t blow me off?”. Eventually she apologized and both of us said our peace.

Another prime example was letting a guy I knew, Paul, know that I liked him. I feel it was one of the biggest mistakes that I made. Like the quote above, I think it was something that he didn’t want to know.

It was really awkward afterwards between us and it hurt … I’m not going to pretend it didn’t … but it did. I remember a buddy of mine telling me to stop bitching about him and move on.

I was quite surprised that he had the balls to say that to me because he’s not usually the type of person to be honest with you up front.

Honesty, it’s like a double edge sword. I know it hurts, but I’d rather have honesty from people then having them lie to me, and one thing I cannot stand is when people lie to me. It's one of my many pet peeves, and people in my life know this about me.

So at the end of the day, is the best thing to do for your friends is to be honest with them? I say yes, it may hurt, but I’d rather hear it from a friend than a complete stranger off the street.

posted on May 6, 2008 2:30 PM ()

Comments:

Sorry finally able to read and comment ur posts. I think ur completely right about honesty. I have the same feelings for that like you. But there is 1 thing I still cant be honest about to my wife, wish I was able to.... thx for this post cause its something whas keeping me busy.
comment by itsjustme on May 12, 2008 10:43 AM ()
I believe in honesty, as well. I just think it depends on the circumstances, as to how you present the truth. While being truthful is necessary, it must be done in such a way that the person can receive it. I hope this makes sense.
comment by hopefields on May 10, 2008 12:39 AM ()
I believe honesty is the best policy and I am honest, but
I don't confront people with unpleasant truths unless it is
really necessary.
comment by larryb on May 6, 2008 7:35 PM ()
I was an habitual liar for the first 30 years of my life for many reasons which I plan to blog about some day but for the past 42 years I have been 100% honest about my feelings--have lost friends, been cussed out, been really hurt and have hurt others with the truth and I don't regret being honest one bit!
comment by greatmartin on May 6, 2008 6:21 PM ()
If they don't like who you really are and how you really feel about things, then that says something about rather or not they are a "true" friend in the first place. Honesty is a good way to discover those who really care for you, I think...
comment by ekyprogressive on May 6, 2008 3:10 PM ()
Good post there,Matt.
A fine job.So proud of you.
How mom doing there?
comment by fredo on May 6, 2008 2:49 PM ()
You are right!! I believe honesty is best in the long run.
comment by texastar on May 6, 2008 2:40 PM ()
You are right about honesty being a tough nut to crack. I guess I am probably selective about my honesty. I try and be as honest as possible, but sometimes I find that diplomacy kicks in. Maybe that is a bad thing, but I am too much of a softy to be much else.
AJ
comment by lunarhunk on May 6, 2008 2:34 PM ()

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