I had an interesting thing happen this week at one of my meetings. I can't go into the details of the time for a particular reason ... one that I will describe later. As with most meetings, some of the participants arrived early, and we were sitting around just chatting. The conversations were not really tied to the reason for the meeting. The discussion focused on things from our daily lives.

In the process, discussion turned to American Idol, which is probably not uncommon. Even though it has been around for a while, tons of people still watch. I have never really watched it, but I hear about it every morning on the radio. Well, during the conversation, it was clear that everyone agreed that Adam was probably going to be the winner.

As we were talking about it, an older gentleman that was part of the conversation said that he "didn't like the queer even though he could sing" or something similar. It was clear that it brought about an awkward situation because everyone stopped talking. I know that I was probably a big part of the reason because just about everyone there knows about my relationship status, though, I am thinking this guy was oblivious. I don't make grand announcements, but I don't hide anything in the course of the conversation.

To make matters more interesting, another person at the meeting is closeted, and I know. We have known each other for a while so that person's status. (This would be why I didn't want to mention any details).

Anyway, I am trying to figure out how I want to go about talking to the guy. Considering his age and his professional background, it is not surprising that he would make such homophobic statements. I wanted to point out that what he said was hurtful, but definitely did not want to call him out in front of an audience. My experience is that would not make the discussion go well. Making a person publicly embarrassed doesn't lead to enlightenment.

Normally, I would give him a call or drop him an email highlighting how what he said makes people feel because it is really hurtful. That would allow us to have the conversation one-on-one. The problem is that when my laptop died a few weeks ago, it took along the contact list for that organization.

We also won't have another meeting so it is not like I can pull him aside before or after the next meeting because it would really be putting things off.

So, does anyone have any suggestions about how to kick off the conversation?

On a side note, this was not something that happened at work so it is not something that I would complain about with superiors.