Hey,well I'm not really good at this.Anyway without going back in blog history here it is.(Me)34 have a 7 yr old son.I just got married in 2003.But been with husband since (1989).17yrs.I've worked hard since I was 15 until I got pregnant.After birth went to CNA school back to work.2 yrs later we decided for me to stay home with son.That started to push what friends I had away.So the war in Iraq came about.As you know there he went.I had NEVER ever been away from him and alone.In all these yrs.It was tough.Real tough emotionally.I went thru many changes.Or growing up so to speak.No one would come around me which I found odd.I thought my friends and family would be there for me.NOT!!That was heartbreaking.People just didn't want to think about the war or be reminded of it at all.Well I couldn't forget.I had to deal with oh gosh will he be OK today.This lasted for  18-19 mths.All I can say is it will make or break you.So in a way I've been alone for awhile now.He just got back in country Christmas.Still he wasn't home in Tennessee.He was in Mississippi.It took its toll(him being here and not seeing him.So he got a job as an instructor(OC) training all military on convoys down here.Before they get deployed to Iraq.#1 taking this job was the only way for him to not get re-deployed again at the end of 06 the start of 07.I just couldn't handle that at all.So I pack up and move down here to MS.To be with him.

        But,on the 4th of July last yr.I got pulled over for DUI(nobodys perfect huh)so 1 of the many strains on (us) is we have to drive once a month back to Tenn.So many things go into this.Have to remember to save money for gas.It is 700hundred miles.That is along trip anyway you look at it.It was nice at first cause I missed the trees and lakes,mtns, and my mom.I just wish we could go for at least 2 mths and go back.My son is taking classes and Alan's work schedule, and sports.It is hard to pick a date to go back on.And start a life here.They won't let me transfer my probation til i take this driving class.There is the problem the "class" is 2 a week for 3 weeks.I'm stressed out. To say the least.I have no friends here.Just this computer.We are having problems getting adjusted to each other.Plus living in a new area.The changes have been emotional.At times wanting to just pack up and go home.We own our home in TN.It is always an option.(at times a threat)unfortunately.Well there it is.Oh he is dealing with PTSD.Which isn't any surprise to me because he in a way is still doing what he did in Iraq.It just isn't Iraq...He hasn't had time to heal all that he saw and dealt with over there.So the nightmares come and different things....Its hard.Well I hope I didn't bore you.This is my life.Full of problems lately.I just have this site to vent or cry and need some support from time to time.If you can put up with my cRaZy thoughts,opinions.If not that is fine(guess i would have to be huh!)This is my friend,shoulder,Dr so.There U go...