I went to court this afternoon and decisions were made.  I was granted enough time to pack and prepare for our move and will have the finances in order to complete the move.  I won't have to depend on the kindness (or money) of another to do what is necessary to relocate my daughter and I.  We will be moved before she starts school again after the holiday break.
Some stress is off my shoulders now that I have a reasonable time frame in sight.  I plan to hold a moving sale after Christmas, but I'm not sure which weekend I will do it yet.  Now it is time to prepare for that.  The more I can sell and donate the less I will have to move.
This was a day I wasn't looking forward to but feel some relief now that it is over.  R made the comment this morning that he was going to return the Christmas presents to the store so he could get back his money.  I proceeded to try to pay him for the items that he bought for my daughter but he simply opened the front door as I left and threw what little money I had on the ground.  I picked it up and decided I would use the money to buy what I wanted to get for my daughter.
It was like a gong went off in my head and I realized how cold hearted R could be through everything that was happening plus the fact that it is Christmas next week.  I was completely turned off by the abusive manner in which he spoke to me and had yet another thing going on to make me feel physically sick.  (For the past couple of days it was this court date.)
I am so sick of having to endure this when R has the heat put to him.  I am so stupid to put up with the verbal abuse.  R can only rant on and on about the place where my daughter are going to have to move but seems to completely miss the reality that we are losing the apartment that we have lived in for almost two years.
I can honestly say that I will not put my trust in a man ever again.  I can also say that this move is one of the best things to happen to me, at least.  I am going to leave this dysfunctional relationship behind and focus on healing.
My daughter's therapist has tried to be encouraging with me when discussing the effect R has had on her life.  She tells me that daughter will have learned who NOT to chose through this situation.  My daughter has learned what a healthy relationship is NOT.
It really sucks that my daughter has had to go through this.  Her father bailed before she was a year old, her brother decided to go where he could roam free, and now the idiot her mother gave a second chance to has struck the final blow in us losing our place to live.  I don't know if my daughter will ever have a positive relationship with a man.
I now know what will go on when, and I know what direction I want to head from here.  I really want to get on my feet again, get a job, have a life, and enjoy my daughter while she goes into teenage hood (eek) and beyond.
I do appreciate my friends I have here, in the armpit of Michigan, women who I am proud to call my sisters, my family.  And I appreciate my friends online, and the encouragement and hope they provide me.  I have seen others grow and thrive here, and they show me it can be done.