Did you miss me? Rhetorical question. You're probably sitting there saying "no, were you gone?"

Well, yes, I went to that funeral in Denver and stayed with friends for a couple of nights. Did I find something to wear? Yes I did, thank you for asking. I'm very happy with it and it's quite slimming. It went okay with my black Teva sandals, for a sort of gypsy/aged hippie look, and I borrowed a bead necklace with many strands (think Barbara Bush era) that added just the right touch of outmodedness. But I was very content. Many of the country club ladies who were there wore pant suits, and I'm glad I didn't even try to go there because whatever I would be willing to spend the money on would look very tacky and cheap next to their Neiman Marcus designer originals. Seriously.

That said, I was not the worst dressed woman there: the widower's brother & family came from Greeley and their son, who looked to be about 60 looked like a true aged hippie with long reddish pony tail and scraggly beard. His 'old lady' who was 40 something wore a low-cut halter top dress that displayed the tattoo on her boob. Her hair was down to the middle of her back and when she looped it over her shoulder we were treated to the peek-a-boo back of the dress framing the bobcat tattoo between her shoulder blades.

The best thing about it was the lunch at the country club. Walk in the door and pick between white or red wine, served in appropriate glassware. Of course there was a large assortment of other beverages including Pellegrino water. The lunch was nice sandwiches, a potato salad that was supposed to be gourmet, but didn't quite pull it off, chopped up fruit, and the best home-made potato chips, sliced paper thin and cooked toasty brown.

The ladies room aka Powder Room provided hair brushes, hair spray, mouthwash, and hand lotion. The stalls were more like closets - all the way to the ceiling and all the way to the floor. Now that's class.

I had a great time because one of my older cousins who grew up in the same town as me was there and we went around and introduced ourselves to our rich cousins and they vowed to stay in touch. Family experience really doesn't get any better.

P.S. No, my sister didn't show up. I thought for sure the lure of rubbing elbows with the country club set would have lured her out of Wyoming. Just as well because I wouldn't have had a good time if she was there.