Beth

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Username:
spicybitch
Name:
Beth
Location:
Kansas City, KS
Birthday:
10/03
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In A Relationship
Job / Career:
Marketing

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I Have Kissed A Lot Of Frogs...

Life & Events > Relationships > Life is Beautiful ...
 

Life is Beautiful ...

I really wish it was. It seems that life has dealt me a hand of crap lately. Last Friday, while driving to work I got in a car wreck. It was not fun in the least bit. I am trying to remain positive, believe me I know it's tough.

I did about $2500 worth of damage, and I have a rental car to get me around. I scratch that I have a freaking car with it's own zip code. It's a Nissan Sextera. Just kidding it's an Xterra and it's huge. I drive it and the freaking thing rattles. Recently, in a text convo with Kristy we were discussing that I like large cars. Guess what? I totally lied. So I am driving this BIG Ass car, and I feel like I should stop to screw in the bolts tighter because the f'ing thing rattles. I don't recommend this vehicle for purchase and I am pretty sure that the mother f'er is going to be a gas guzzler.

I did decide not to buy, because of the whole down payment issue. My parentals were not able to help out as much as they thought but we're all going to save and perhaps try again next year. So now the quest is on to look for a place to live. Sadly the rental situation you have to wait forever, almost to the end to figure out where you're going to live. It's annoying in my humble opinion, as a TYPE A person it's a challenge to just let live and be.

Grandma is doing better. She's been moved from the 4th floor to the 2nd, I hear that this is a good thing. Since I wrecked my car this Friday I didn't exactly drive all around this weekend.

I have been experiencing negativity, specifically surrounded by my upcoming birthday. Each year I reflect on the previous year. Yes it's been a good year, I have a decent paying job, a home, great friends, a loving dog, and many things to give thanks for. I tend to focus on the negative though, like the fact that I chose the wrong person AGAIN to love. There is something seriously wrong with me that I choose this person who was incapable of loving me back to love. This is not the first time that this has happened. Perhaps, it's easier to make myself available and open to those with whom I have no chance. I don't know, but it seriously irks me in a way that I am not able to describe into words.

I am not upset about cookie. This is the truth... there has been so many other things going on that I have determined that one who is married to one's job should not answer another persons ad for online dating when they specifically request you to NOT have this characteristic. Am I blaming him? Mostly... But he deserves it.

I hope you're all doing much more positively than I. I am seeking positive energy... but some days the negativity/apathy wins out.

SB

posted on Sept 16, 2008 5:25 PM ()

Comments:

I have been in a rather pessimistic frame of mind myself. I think it's the moon.
comment by walkwithgrace on Sept 26, 2008 11:14 PM ()
Do some number crunching (literally) and see what year this will be for you in Numerology. I find that to be more accurate than astrology and very enlightening. Your "New Year" technically doesn't start until your birthday anyway and if you look back you'll see that many of your life changes started around your birthday.
comment by hawkwoman on Sept 21, 2008 4:27 PM ()
*opens up her pouch of positive powder*

Well phuck. The bastids nearly empty!

*throws the crusty bit in the corner at yew*

comment by dazeymae on Sept 18, 2008 4:00 PM ()
I totally understand how life's events can knock the wind out of your sails! Four weeks ago, I got bucked off my horse,was knocked unconscious, bit off a piece of my tongue, and screwed up my fifty-five year old back REALLY GOOD! (Twelve chiropractor visits later, I'm still in pain.)
However, it was a beautiful, crisp morning today, and there were deer and turkeys in my pasture mingling with my horses. The mist was at tree-tip level, and the orange sun was rising up over the eastern ridge of the world like a huge cinnamon dot. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stay upset.
comment by hayduke on Sept 18, 2008 10:07 AM ()
Life has a tendency to throw curveballs. Duck and wait for the first good pitch. (This is a stupid metaphor, but what the hell.)
comment by solitaire on Sept 17, 2008 2:41 PM ()
comment by mrsstu on Sept 17, 2008 10:14 AM ()
yes I have ridden in your car. In fact I was spat upon by your dearest Max... hehehe Remember? So yeah, dog hair doesn't gross me out.
comment by kristilyn3 on Sept 17, 2008 8:16 AM ()
There's the high and low tides in life...catch the next high tide and ride that crest as long as you can...best of wishes
comment by strider333 on Sept 16, 2008 8:14 PM ()
Good Luck with the large vehicle... I live that daily. Hence getting a bike. Hope you and the car will be okay.
And sadly I find that when I feel positive, positive things happen. I struggle with the negative sometimes. Gotta find the positives and hold onto 'em!
comment by sexysadie on Sept 16, 2008 6:30 PM ()
You are not alone in the negatives girl... I know that doesn't help much but you aren't....
I guess I am lucky in that I just think of birthdays as a time when people call you, friends want to see you and surprises happen... When I know nothing is going to happen I make them happen, like charging a trip to Vegas. While I know you are smarter than this, it did help get me through!
Hang in there... it's been a rough couple of weeks. I am glad you know that there are good things along with the bad, although I am TOTALLY with you on focusing on the negative far too often.
I heart you and I can't wait for wine night. It might be wine night/dog hair night cuz I am just not feeling the vacuum...
comment by kristilyn3 on Sept 16, 2008 5:32 PM ()

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