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By Bob Dotson
TODAYShow.com contributor
updated 1:40 p.m. CT, Fri., Nov. 7, 2008
Xiamara Mena stands amid an army of tombstones. She has come here to begin the long, slow business of learning how to live alone. Her son, Army Cpl. Andy Anderson, is buried here among our heroes in Arlington National Cemetery. He was killed in Iraq two years ago.
"The second year is pretty hard," Xiamara sighs, wiping away a tear. Now the Army Reserve is sending Andy's twin brothers — Rafael and Randall — to Afghanistan.
Killed on Mother’s Day
Other mothers have also come to visit their sons' graves this day. Beth Belle kisses a nearby headstone, then offers a hug. The embrace says silently what no one can put into words.
Beth was planning her boy's homecoming party from Afghanistan when Lance Cpl. Nicholas Kirven was killed, on Mother's Day. He so loved the Marines that Beth and her husband allowed him to enlist at 17.
"He was always a peacemaker," Beth says. The kind of kid who, when he touched someone's life, they shined. In Afghanistan, the infantry rifleman passed out Beanie Babies and rebuilt houses before he died chasing insurgents into a cave. That was three and a half years ago.
"The first thing any new mother asks is, 'Does it get better?' " Beth pauses, lost in thought. "I have to tell them, 'No.' " Time does not heal all wounds; it just gives you a few more seconds each day before the loss begins again.
Paula Davis rises from her son's grave and joins Xiamara and Beth. She, too, understands the public smiles and private tears of a mother who has lost a child. A mortar shell took her only son, Army Pfc. Justin Davis.
She leaves a new picture of him at his grave every week, even though technically that's not allowed. "I want people to realize that this is a human being. It's not just a number. It's not just a name." Paula pauses and looks down. She takes a deep breath, then says fervently, "I want them to see this person who's here."
Justin’s heroes were God, Martin Luther King and Bruce Lee. He loved kung fu movies, even shot one of his own — on the front lines in Afghanistan. Said he wanted to be an actor.
FAMOUS PEOPLE IN HISTORY BORN ON NOVEMBER 11:
1744 - Abigail Smith Adams
First Lady: wife of 2nd U.S. President of the United States John Adams; died Oct 28, 1818
1821 - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
political revolutionary, author: The Brothers Karamazov, Crime and Punishment, The Idiot; died Feb 9, 1881
1836 - Thomas Bailey Aldrich
author: The Story of a Bad Boy, Cruise of the Dolphin, The Sisters' Tragedy, The Wyndham Towers; died Mar 19, 1907
1885 - George S. (Smith) Patton Jr.
‘Old Blood and Guts’: U.S. Army General: commander of Third Army during drive across France in WWII: “Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. You won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.â€; subject of film: Patton; died Dec 21, 1945
1889 - Clifton Webb (Webb Parmalee Hollenbeck)
actor: Laura, Razor’s Edge, Satan Never Sleeps, Titanic, Three Coins in the Fountain, Sitting Pretty, Mr. Belvedere series; died Oct 13, 1966
1899 - Pat (William Joseph Patrick) O’Brien
actor: Knute Rockne, All American, Ragtime, Fighting Father Dunne, Some like It Hot, Harrigan and Son; died Oct 15, 1983
1899 - Pie (Harold Joseph) Traynor
Baseball Hall of Famer: Pittsburgh Pirates third baseman: [World Series: 1925, 1927/all-star: 1933, 1934]; playing manager, Pirates’ scout, radio announcer; died Mar 16, 1972
1909 - Robert Ryan
actor: Bad Day at Black Rock, Battle of the Bulge, The Dirty Dozen, Flying Leathernecks, The Longest Day, On Dangerous Ground; TV narrator: World War I; died July 11, 1973
1911 - Patric (Reginald Lawrence) Knowles
actor: Chisum, The Devil’s Brigade, Auntie Mame, Three Came Home, Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman, The Wolfman, How Green was My Valley, The Adventures of Robin Hood [1938], The Charge of the Light Brigade; died Dec 23, 1995
1918 - Stubby Kaye
actor: Cat Ballou, Guys and Dolls, Li’l Abner, Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, My Sister Eileen, Love & Marriage; TV panelist: Pantomime Quiz; died Dec 14, 1997
1922 - Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
writer: Slaughterhouse Five, Cat’s Cradle, Breakfast of Champions; died Apr 11, 2007
1925 - Jonathan (Harshman) Winters III
Emmy Award-winning actor, comedian: Davis Rules [1990-91]; The Wacky World of Jonathan Winters, NBC Comedy Hour, The Jonathan Winters Show, Mork & Mindy, Hee Haw, And Here’s the Show, The Andy Williams Show, The Fish that Saved Pittsburgh, It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, The Shadow, The Flintstones; character: Maude Frickert; TV panelist: Masquerade Party; commercials: Hefty trash bags
1929 - LaVern Baker
singer: Tweedle-Dee, I Cried a Tear, Jim Dandy; second woman [Aretha Franklin was first] inducted into Rock and Roll Hall of Fame [1991]; died March 10, 1997
1935 - Bibi (Birgitta) Andersson
actress: Duel at Diablo, Story of a Woman, The Concorde: Airport ’79
1938 - Roger Lavern (Jackson)
musician: keyboards: group: The Tornados: Telstar, Globetrotter
1939 - Denise Alexander
actress: General Hospital
1944 - Jesse Colin Young (Perry Miller)
songwriter, musician: group: The Youngbloods: Get Together
1945 - Vince Martell
musician: guitar, singer: group: Vanilla Fudge: You Keep Me Hanging On, Take Me for a Little While
1945 - Daniel Ortega Saavedra
President: Nicaragua
1946 - Chris Dreja
musician: guitar: group: Yardbirds: For Your Love, I’m a Man
1947 - Pat Daugherty
musician: bass: group: Black Oak Arkansas: Jim Dandy to the Rescue, Memories at the Window
1950 - Jim Peterik
musician: keyboard: group: Survivor: Eye of the Tiger, Burning Heart; singer: group: Ides of March: Vehicle
1951 - Paul Cowsill
singer: group: The Cowsills: Hair, Indian Lake
1951 - Fuzzy (Frank) Zoeller
golf champion: Masters [1979], U.S. Open [1984]
1956 - Ian Craig Marsh
musician: keyboards: group: Heaven 17: We Don’t Need This Fascist Groove Thang, Ball of Confusion, Temptation, Crushed by the Wheels of Industry, Soul Deep, The Foolish Thing to Do, Steel City; Human League: LP: Reproduction
1962 - Mic Michaeli
musician: keyboard: group: Europe: The Final Countdown
1962 - Demi Moore (Demetria Guynes)
actress: Indecent Proposal, Ghost, The Seventh Sign, A Few Good Men, Color of Night, St. Elmo’s Fire, Choices, General Hospital, Striptease, G.I. Jane
1964 - Calista Flockhart
actress: Ally McBeal, The Guiding Light, Pictures of Baby Jane Doe, Telling Lies in America
1964 - Philip McKeon
actor: Alice, Red Surf, Return to Horror High
1968 - Ronnie Devoe
singer: groups: New Edition, Bell Biv Devoe: Poison
1974 - Leonardo (Wilhelm) DiCaprio
actor: Titanic, Parenthood, Growing Pains, Critters 3, What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, The Man in the Iron Mask, The Aviator
AND OBAMA'S GOT A TIGER BY THE TAIL FOR SURE!
