I woke up this morning and immediately I realised something was wrong. All the sounds I heard were in mono.

Then it hit me: my right ear isn’t working right.

It was horrible - the ringing was nearly unbearable - it was clearly some sort of tinnitus, like you get after going to a loud gig. Only this time, only the right half of my head had been to the gig, and worse still the gig had not actually happened.

This caused me to panic a bit - I don’t know much about medical things, when it comes to my own well-being, I work from the position that “ignorance is strength”, as I don’t want to know if I’m really ill or not.

I was worried that I was going deaf - which would be a right pain in the ass. So my Mom drove me to the ER and spoke to the “triage nurse”, whatever that means, who had a look in my ears.

Long story short, I need to put warm olive oil in my ears for some reason. I can’t work out whether this is actually going to be useful, or whether I’m just going to look like a twat. I just hope that if this doesn’t work they don’t move on to recommending ear candles.

So, hopefully my ears will be fixed soon. If you want to try and understand what its like to communicate with me at the moment, try reading this again but IN CAPITAL LETTERS.


Hope everyone had a safe and enjoyable July 4 weekend!