Can openers. Nothing can be more f***ed up than that peice of metal contraption.
The can opener, is the grand master of fooling everyone ! Thats right EVERYONE. THe first few days with the can opener are peaceful, lovely and almost empowering. For once in your life you can open big cans with ease and skill. You feel like an god over canned goods. That my freind dosent last. Enjoy those precious memories of feeling awesome, for those will disappear. Eventually the can opener will begin its process of looking mean, ugly and angry. It wil chew the can like a rabid racoon but it wont open the can for you. It will just scratch, bend, grind the can in every direction. Causing the paper label to be strewn about, like some crash scene. You are left to curse. And now youre alone, hungry and sad. No longer can you open the can with ease. Its an epic battle of arm strength and will. Eventually when stravation kicks in, you end up stabbing the can violently with a sharp blade. The possibility of harming yourself is high. The risk of starving is even higher. Choose wisely.

The Dishes. A Pain in the arse to do. And there is always one last Mother Effing Knife or Spoon in the Mother Effing sink after you finish washing all the dishes.