I am having one of those selfish days. I work with the public-and on my days off I try to get a day where I spend as little time with my fellow humans as possible.
Even going to the laundry mat can be a good time. You just have to know how to do it right. I always make sure I have a book and some coffee. There is no phone, no computer and on the most part people leave you alone.
Except for those idiots who just have a conversation.
“What you doing?”
“(Ok you are a blind idiot-lets make this simple, see the book) Reading.”
“You like to read?”
“(No but they frown on me killing you.) Yep.”
“ ME I like to talk to people.”
“(And just annoying the hell out of them must be a real joy) I see that.”
“I am not bothering you am I?”
“ No not a bit ( I was just sitting over here by myself, reading, ignoring the world hoping-no praying that you would come over ---NOT)”
“ I just got out of the hospital.”
“(Mental?) Really? (you are on your meds, right?)
“ Yep-had Gall Bladder surgery.”
“ You doing Ok??
“ Fine - you want to see the scar?”
“ No that’s ok-shouldn’t you be home recovering?”
“ My son took pictures on his cell phone of the operation-You want to see them?
“(Please Jesus kill me now)”--(No really just kill me now) No that’s ok.”
“ Are you sure-it’s no problem?”
‘(Well there goes my chances of ever eating again) Can you excuse me-I need to go call my parole officer-us serial killers need to keep in touch.”
“ All you have to is call? I have to wear a ankle bracelet.”
“ Look my laundry is done. ( thank you Jesus) Gota go.”
Yep going to the laundry can be so much fun.

See ya