> >
> > Dear wife:
> >
> > I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've
> > been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These
> > last 2 weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you quit your
> > job today & that was the last straw.
> >
> >
> >
> > Last week, you came home & didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had
> > cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You
> > ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps.
> >
> >
> >
> > You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that
> > connects us as husband & wife. Either you're cheating on me or you don't
> > love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.
> >
> > Your EX-Husband
> > P.S. don't try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia
> > together!
> >
> >
> >
> > Have a great life!
> >
> >
> >
> > Her letter
> >
> >
> > Dear Ex-Husband
> >
> > Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true you & I
> > have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what
> > you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant
> > whining & griping. Too bad that doesn't work.
> >
> >
> >
> > I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came
> > to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised me not to
> > say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment. And when
> > you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY
> > SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago.
> >
> >
> >
> > About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price
> > tag was still on them, & ; I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had
> > just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
> >
> >
> >
> > After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it
> > out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my
> > job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.
> > Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling
> > life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you
> > won't get a dime from me. So take care.
> >
> >
> >
> > Signed,
> > Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
> >
> > P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born
> > Carl. I hope that's not a problem
>
>
>