Who was manufactured to destroy. This is a line from the new song "Lady in Spain" by Ingrid Michaleson. I have modified it slightly to suit my current purposes. Tomorrow is SD's bday and I sent him an e-card, to thank him for the flowers and wish him a happy birthday.

I am content with sending this e-card because it is clear that there is no window. But I was thinking about everything that I did for him a year ago. I sent him a care package to Singapore. In it I had a certificate with a star named after him. There were a number of dollar store purchase for him to celebrate his birthday with. And what pray tell did he do for my birthday last year? He may have sent me a text on the day. I believe we didn't talk on the phone till his birthday.

What irks me--what really freaking irks me. The whole time we dated there was not one freaking flower display. Not once. When I packed up my book case in between the books I found a card that he wrote to me when we got back together. I threw it away promptly.

No he wasn't good enough. Am I truly over him. Probably not. It's a sad state of affairs and I would like to be OVER It.