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 Then that thought that creeps into my mind so often like an insidious snake reared its ugly head once more. "Is this all there is for me?"Â
Am I going to live out my life in rote, going about the dreary routine of daily chores with no hope nor expectation that at the end of the day, my soulmate will be there to make it all wortwhile?
I've lived my entire adult life asking "Why?" Why didn't he confide in me how desperate he was? Why did he listen to and believe the lies his mother told him? Why didn't he love me enough to tell her to butt out of our life?Â
She didn't know me. She spent the first thirty minutes interrogating me, drawing all the wrong conclusions. It occurred to me at the time that I should tell Gordon that I thought I was ready to leave when she asked me if my hair was naturally curly.Â
I was smart enough to pick up on what she was hinting at; but it was Gordon's mother and I desperately wanted her to like me. So, I dismissed the comment, primarily because it was so ludicrous that I thought she couldn't possibly think such a horrible thing.
The rest of the weekend she ignored me, barely even bothering to speak to me. The woman didn't even give herself or me a chance to be friends.
Some days I truly feel I have forgiven her; other days it hurts so badly that I don't really know if I can ever forgive her.
She took away my reason for living and my future.????
Click on widget to read my other post today.Does anyone else have this mystery visitor or know who lablover is????
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