My life should be a reality show, because last week would have been a great episode.
On Thursday I took the dog out at 5:50 pm. There was this woman on her cell phone across the field holding this German Shepherd mix with one hand. It took one look at Woody and I and made a mad dash over to us. It yanked right out of cell phone lady's hand.It got my dog around the back of the neck in attack/kill mode. I stupidly tried to grab the dog's jaws apart only to fuck my hands up real bad. After a few minutes of this dog trying to kill mine, I punched it as hard as I could on the top of the snout. It let go, but there I was holding her dog while mine is running around bleeding and screaming. Cell phone asshole's idea to help was to DIAL HER BROTHER!!! So I got her to put my dog into the stairwell while I had her dog held down. She shut the door, I let her dog go. My dog has a two inch laceration on his neck. He needed 14 stitches. $315s later. We called the cops. Roger ended up running down there and calling the woman a stupid bitch. Animal control fined her $180. She is opting to have the dog put down. That's on her head.
Now we have to go about getting her to pay the bill. She's military, we could be assholes and call her commanding officer, but we'd only do that as a last resort.
Onto something lighter-The woman downstairs had a stroke, yes I said something lighter. She's 95 years old. The ironic thing is she has a package waiting for her at the office from Life Alert. I guess they where just a little too late as the song goes.
And even lighter. We had a birthday party for my niece B. One of her friends is so poor that the only thing he could get her for her birthday was a half full box of candy canes from Xmas. I don't care who you are, that's fucking sad. It makes me count my blessings so-to-speak. To add insult to injury, the kid is a hermaphrodite, and all the other kids know and make fun of him.
I hope you enjoyed my oh-so-happy post. Take care all.