>> CHRISTMAS COOKIE RULES>> 1. If you eat a Christmas cookie fresh out of the oven, it has nocalories > because everyone knows that the first cookie is the test and thuscalorie > free.>> 2. If you drink a diet soda after eating your second cookie, it alsohas > no calories because the diet soda cancels out the cookie calories.>> 3. If a friend comes over while you're making your Christmas cookiesand > needs to sample, you must sample with your friend. Because yourfriend's > first cookie is calories free, rule #1 is yours also. It would be rudeto > let your friend sample alone and, being the friend that you are, that > makes your cookie calorie free.>> 4. Any cookie calories consumed while walking around will fall to your > feet and eventually fall off as you move. This is due to gravity andthe > density of the caloric mass.>> 5. Any calories consumed during the frosting of the Christmas cookieswill > be used up because it takes many calories to lick excess frosting froma > knife without cutting your tongue.>> 6. Cookies colored red or green have very few calories. Red ones have > three and green ones have five - one calorie for each letter. Makemore > red ones!>> 7. Cookies eaten while watching "Miracle on 34th Street" have nocalories > because they are part of the entertainment package and not part ofone's > personal fuel.>> 8. As always, cookie pieces contain no calories because the process of > breaking causes calorie leakage.>> 9. Any cookies consumed from someone else's plate have no caloriessince > the calories rightfully belong to the other person and will cling totheir > plate. We all know how calories like to CLING!>> 10. Any cookies consumed while feeling stressed have no caloriesbecause > cookies used for medicinal purposes NEVER have calories. It's a rule