Even though the following REO Speedwagon lyrics ("That Ain't Love") are about love, that word and sentiment can be substituted with friendship just as well.
You tell me what you think I’m feelin’, you know why I do what I do
Why should you listen to a word I’m sayin’, when it’s already so clear to you
You tell me ’bout my bad intentions, you doubt the very things I hold true
I can no longer live with your misconceptions, baby all I can say to you, is
Chorus:
That ain’t love, I believe you’ve got the wrong emotion
That ain’t love, at least it doesn’t feel like love to me
As long as I say what you wanna hear
Do what you wanna do, be who you want me to be
You think that’s love, well baby that ain’t love to me
Love and friendship are both based on the same emotions, not on expectations and demands. Love and friendship overlook flaws and disagreements, and they occur despite differences. Those who come into relationships with demands and expectations, attach strings and conditions to love and friendship, or who can't overlook differences aren't worthy of love or friendship. They usually just end up bringing more pain than joy because they don't grasp things like the "mutual" part of "mutual respect."
I don't know why I was still thinking of this when I shut down last night except it's the second time in recent weeks this issue has arisen. I don't know if the two circumstances are related, nor do I really care to know more. I just hate that feeling of estrangement and disillusionment I get when someone I considered a friend has had a hoop for me to jump through to remain a friend (or for love). And I can feel for anyone going through it.
For the record, I have a no hoops and no strings zone. I'll try this again and make the first move by adding a buddy who may not want to be one. No hard feelings, Mary?