The 2010 Winter Olympics open in two days, Friday, February 12, and no one is more excited than we are.  The only thing the girls and I love more than the Olympics is Oklahoma football.

We are worried though.  No snow in Vancouver and temperature in the 40's.  What the heck is that all about?  I knew we should have held the Olympics in D.C.  Heck, we've got snowdrifts taller than mountains right now.  And talk about fresh powder!!  We've got it! 

We've got a three-foot base with a foot of new powder.  Now, that beats hauling it in anyday!

I know our good friends, the Canadians, will be ready when the time comes though, and so will we!

I'll tell you what!  We may not be able to "walk the walk", but we can sure "talk the talk!"  We know the difference between the downhill and the slolam--doesn't everyone?  They have those little poley thing-a-ma-jigs on the slolam and the skiier has to go through them.  The downhill, on the other hand, is just go straight down the side of a mountain as slick as glass at about 75 mph.  What could be so hard about that?

We understand the aerials too.  We know a half pike is not part of a turnpike; we understand a spiral has something to do with spinning, and we know landing on his feet will definitely get the guy more points than landing on his butt.

Then, there's speed skating.  That's nothing more than blasting around an oval track of snot-slick ice on blades as thin as paper just as fast as you can; it's not to be confused with short-track skating where the idea is to see how many guys get wiped out before the finish.

Aw, and finally, the beauty of figure skating where the idea is to do as many jumps as possible in four minutes and execute as many revolutions on each jump as possible.  It used to be all about grace and motion; now it's all about power and athleticism. Reason for that is it makes it harder for the judges to cheat on the skaters' scores.  Either you can do the jumps or you can't.

Lastly, there's that wonderful sport, "curling," which competes with boredom and loses. We don't have the slightest idea what the object of that game is; but we're such sports nuts, we watch it anyway.

That's my first report on the Olympics.  More to come. 


>