I worked forty-five years for someone else
So that I could retire.
I dreamed of sleeping late
And sitting by the fire.
I dreamed of long vacations,
Enjoying stage and song,
But, let me set you straight on that concept,
It is simply wrong.
I did junk my safety glasses
And the work boots that cramped my toes,
But , the rest of of had a mind of its own
And this is how it goes.
My wife had been thinking of retirement
And had plans of her own,
She had spent much time with the kids
But, now they are all grown and gone.
We sold our cattle and horses
So we wouldn't have that chore.
I poured concrete over my alarm clock
But, I still wake up at four.
I get my eyes checked on Monday,
She gets hers checked the next day.
I go for a colon check on Wednesday
And pass my wife going the other way.
I have a dental appointment on Thursday,
She goes for a test on heart.
Friday, we go get prescriptions filled
And browse a while at Wal-Mart.
Saturdays, we just stay home
And try to get the paper work right.
We can't take any overnight trips
'Cause we can't see to drive at night.
Restroom confusion keeps us out of church on Sunday
And we really do hate that.
There's nothing wrong with the restrooms,
We just can't remember where they're at.
We don't need to plan next week,
Just make sure we can drive.
And not forget where the hospitals and clinics are,
We'll need them to survive.
So, don't build your castles too high, my friend,
While strolling through the clover.
This is a typical week in retirement,
And on Monday we start all over!