I dislike extremism so much it actually hurts my brain to think about it. I have watched it turn intelligent rationale people into mindless drones. It doesn't even seem to matter what you are being extreme about. There seems to be a line where you cross over from passionate believer to scary person. Maybe I am being naive but didn't we use to value thinking in this world.

I am passionate about many things. I like nothing better than a good debate with someone who doesn't feel the same way I feel. Thinking is like a drug to me. If during the debate we cross over into an area I don't know anything about I will tell you. I want to know it all but know I don't.

Having strong beliefs doesn't make you an extremist. When those strong beliefs make it impossible for you to look at the world and process the fact not everyone has to believe like you do, I think you have taken the giant step into the land of irrational. When those beliefs are about something as innocuous as what the best coffee is I am not too worried about you. When it starts crossing over into some of the big areas than I worry.

I don't give anyone a break on this. Extremism is everywhere. From blowing up airplanes to blowing up abortion clinics. Death threats against Democrats for passing the health reform bill. Thinking like this frightens me. Extremism leading to violence is the worst but it isn't the only example cropping up in the world today.

We have people passing laws denying people freedoms because of who they choose to love. We have liberal and conservative television stations which will twist the news up so many times to make it fit their point of view, it isn't recognizable anymore. My favorite example of the last year was James Randi (a world renowned critical thinker and skeptic) who said he wasn't convinced about global warming and got his ass absolutely pounded into the ground by people who would have called him a hero one day earlier. They actually call people who don't believe in global warming deniers. A term often used to describe people who don't think the Holocaust happened. I don't think calling people names is a good way to debate an issue.

Extreme thinking often leads to more extreme thinking by people who are worried you are going to steam roll their belief systems. It helps no one. The world needs to wake the fuck up and take a moment to think. I promise it won't hurt. We need to actually communicate thoughts and then listen as others communicate back. We have to back off the extremes and find a way to live with each other. If we don't, I think we are going to be in for a long bumpy ride. We are not going to enjoy it.



Posted by Christopher at 9:37 PM 0 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, U.S. News, World News
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Tattooed Paper







I think fiction saved my life. Looking back on all the ways my life might have gone. The paths and choices I made. I feel fortunate to end up in a place where I feel surrounded by love, music, and art. Fiction made the non-fiction freak show of my life easier to get through.

The memories of being huddled up under a blanket with a flash light reading. Of turning the pages of comics and books. The characters who formed in my brain and became my guides. The stories which became my world. Fiction was the one constant.

In third grade I began to carry a journal with me everywhere. Reading had turned into writing. The creations of worlds not my own became one of the only joys I brought into adulthood. The sound of a pen digging into the paper as the words flowed out of me was like music. My concentration and determination so bold and powerful I would leave marks on the paper beneath the one I was writing on. I tattooed that paper, I left part of myself on every sheet.

It is what I hate about most classrooms today. It can suck the very life out of our students passions. Students who I know are no different than me. Searching for adulthood. Trying to find the path and the passion they can follow down. It has always been this way. I can remember teachers telling me I wouldn't be a writer. Teachers telling me I was a failure. I didn't have a teacher take an interest in my writing until high school.

It needs to stop. We need to encourage students to be great at what inspires them. Build a core foundation of knowledge. Teach them learning new things is exciting and interesting. Turn them loose on what brings them joy.

Today I watched a young girl (10 years old) drawing a horse. She had a book open and was sketching it on a piece of paper. It was beautiful and inspiring. As I watched her my heart skipped a beat. Her joy was leaking out of every pore in her body. When I sat down and talked to her about her art it became obvious no one had ever really told her how good she was. Not one adult had talked to her about what she might be able to do if she kept at it.

I brought her over to the computer and began showing her different styles and talking to her about what she likes to draw but I knew I could never teach her. I can't draw stickmen. Luckily, Molly Crabapple came to my rescue and gave me some book suggestions. I quickly ordered them from Amazon. I talked to the young girl's mom after school and was ecstatic her mom wanted to pursue it.

I hope she never loses her joy. No matter what happens it is the joy which makes the hard work worth it. I lost my joy in writing for a little while. Let it slip through my fingers like grains of sand. Then one day I sat down and began to create. Began to weave and play with words. My heart opened up to the joy. The electricity tingled off my fingertips. We need to encourage the youth of the world to be kind, to care about others, to find their passion. I am always watching my students hoping they will give me signs. Clues to what they love. I don't know what might save their lives but fiction saved mine.



Posted by Christopher at 8:44 PM 3 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, Art, Childhood, Writing
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Sugar Mama Part Trois



The health care reform act has left me inspired. Watching President Obama work tirelessly to bring insurance to those in need because he felt it was the right thing to do. He accomplished what many presidents before him had failed miserably at. I wrote two blogs, one serious and one funny, which have garnered me my two best page hit days in the history of my blog. My blog itself is about to have more hits in four months than I had all of last year.

I could feel it down in my veins. It was time to take another crack at my never ending quest to convince my wife to be my Sugar Mama. Like Don Quixote before me I would not fail at my mission. I know deep down in my bones I am destined to stay home and write. I am not built right for day jobs. It takes thousands of gallons of coffee a week to get me through the blinding harshness of the sun. There are days where the sun beats me down so bad I feel like a crash test dummy.

To stay home and write would be a dream. Stay up late into the night writing. Sleep in until noon. Wake up and read the paper with a steaming hot cup of coffee at my side. Maybe a few hours of Plants vs. Zombies and then off to writing. I know it sounds like a lazy man's fantasy but I swear I would be a writing machine.

Now I would just have to convince Sheri. How could she refuse me? My blog readership is increasing (hell, I am actually getting called names on my blog. I am sure the person who called me ignorant did not intend to make me giddy with happiness but I am weird like that). I have written two novels and I have started my third. No longer could she point to my lack of output as an excuse for not letting me stay home. Now the final piece of the puzzle was in place. National health care reform. I would be able to get insurance as a stay at home writer.

Saying the words "yes I can!" over and over in my head. I braced myself for the coming debate. I would bury her with my best soliloquies. My words would be like a hurricane battering against her best defenses. I threw out the gauntlet of having health insurance like a prize fighter throwing a right hook. I could see the confusion on her face. "I should let you stay home because of health care reform? We already have good insurance. How does this change anything?"

I had thrown my best punch and she had slapped it down like it wasn't even there. I smiled my best Don Juan smile, "I love you honey." She merely shook her head in disdain as she walked away. Her parting comments rattling around in my brain, "How about doing the laundry once every decade and then we'll talk." Wonder Woman couldn't lasso the truth like my wife can.



Posted by Christopher at 7:28 PM 2 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, Sugar Mama
Monday, March 22, 2010
Our Party Politics Are Killing Us



So the Democrats managed to stumble their way through passing health care reform months after they lost the super majority. I believe strongly that making sure all people have health care is the right thing to do. I have watched several people die in my life because they had no health care. The Republican party liked throwing around scare tactics like death panels. I feel not having insurance is a death panel.

Ultimately though, I have to admit I am left sour and disappointed with politics as usual. No Republicans voted for this bill. Zero, nada, not one and maybe it was because they truly felt the bill was flawed. I don't know because that is not the message they delivered. The message they rode home, was death panels, abortions, scare tactics. They refused as a party to enter into an open discussion about health care reform and uninsured people. Many of whom they represent.

This became a political game. It became about making the Democrats look bad. Make President Obama look bad. Win seats back in the Senate and the House. Turn President Obama into a one term President. What I wanted to hear was solutions. I wanted a real debate. Not a bunch of shouting and misdirection.

The Democrats don't come out of this any better. For me they did the right thing but they did it the wrong way. Back room deals. Amendments and executive orders which amounted to nothing more than buying the votes they didn't have to pass the bill. Parliamentary sleight of hand which started to look like a shell game. At least a few Democrats voted against the bill, they didn't all feel the need to play party politics.

Our system is a mess. I desperately yearn for a time where the people of the land are the reasons all decisions are made. A time when reactionary politics and fear are not the currency people pay the voters with. I don't want to hear shouts of "Baby Killer!" floating down in the middle of a debate. I want a world where sane people are making caring decisions. It is ultimately why I like President Obama. He wanted this because he felt it was right. He was willing to risk everything. I can respect that. If we don't straighten out the rest of this mess our politics are going to finish us.



Posted by Christopher at 9:14 PM 1 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, U.S. News
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Enjoy Costa Rica, Rush



Tonight was a historic night in our nation's capitol. It took longer than it ever should have taken but we are now just a short time away from something I have felt was needed in our country a long time ago. There will be screams and shouts but this day will go down in history as the day we finally got something right.

Congress passed a bill for national health care. I believe in national health care with all of my heart. Of all the things I could spend my taxes on this is one I choose. Heal people, not kill people. I don't know if this was the bill which does the trick, I haven't read it. Until I do I will hold my judgement but like most laws in this country it will go into affect and then will be amended as need be.

I hope this bill works but that isn't what I am talking about. No what I am talking about is with the passing of this bill we will finally get rid of that damn windbag Rush Limbaugh. On his radio show a couple of weeks ago Rush said, "If this passes and it's five years from now and all that stuff gets implemented - I am leaving the country. I'll go to Costa Rica."

My only hope is he will move up the timeline. I don't think we should have to wait 5 years. Let him spew his hate somewhere else. I am tired of him and all his colleagues. I will pack his bags and close down his house if he needs a little extra help. Free of charge (I am sure I can find a few volunteers to see him off to the airport).

I do want to be fair. A show of bipartisanship that our politicians seem unable to pull off. If Rush goes than I think we should go ahead and kick Chris Matthews out with him. Maybe we can get shock radio and TV to settle themselves down with both of them gone. If not, than Olbermann and Beck shouldn't get too comfortable, they might be next. Maybe we can buy them a big house in Costa Rica and they can all live together like one big happy family.



Posted by Christopher at 7:58 PM 17 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, U.S. News
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Don't Ask, Don't Tell, & Don't Get Told On



I admit my confusion runs deep on the prejudice in this country against homosexuality. I can't get past the fact that the United States has gone through several large civil rights movements and yet somehow turns a blind eye against massive discrimination that is still going on in this country.

What is particularly distressing to me is that most of the discrimination which occurs against homosexuality has its roots in religion. Religion, that wonderful institution which is not supposed to be part of the law of the land. What a joke. Every state has laws which are completely rooted in religion.

If it isn't schools canceling proms it is the completely ridiculous don't ask, don't tell policy of our armed services. We supposedly trust the men and women of our armed services to keep us safe. To defend our freedoms. To carry a gun and make decisions about who they should use them on. We give them the power of life and death. We, however, don't trust them to not let who they want to sleep with interfere with their job. We do not trust these wielders of freedom to be okay who other soldiers love. We tell them to stand up for our country but make sure you lie to us about who you are.

With national health care raging in the headlines now, I hope President Obama doesn't forget he made some promises about this archaic and silly rule. It is time for it to be gone. It is bad enough I feel it violates people's civil liberties but now it isn't enough to play by their stupid rules. Sgt. Jene Newsome played by them and it didn't make one damn bit of difference. The police of Rapid City, South Dakota showed up at her house looking for her girlfriend. When they called Sgt. Newsome at the base and asked her to come home, she didn't.

Well, it turns out they weren't searching for her girlfriend. Sgt. Newsome had been legally married in Iowa (yeah freaking Iowa!). The police claim while looking through the window they saw a marriage license on the table. The police for reasons known only to them (although I have a few guesses) felt the need to call Sgt. Newsome's base and report the marriage license. She was promptly discharged from the armed services.

This is a travesty. She did everything which was asked of her. She served in our countries armed services protecting the freedoms and rights of United States citizens. Freedoms and rights which she doesn't even get to partake in. She followed their idiotic rule and it got her a big fat kick in the ass.

I don't agree with everything that is done in the world today with United States soldiers but I am not naive. An army is a necessity in today's world. Wouldn't it be unique if those soldiers who fighting for freedom, enjoyed the same freedoms at home. It is time for this policy to go away. There is no wiggle room here.




Posted by Christopher at 1:44 PM 3 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, U.S. News
Friday, March 19, 2010
They Might Be Cannibals



Here's the thing, without beating a dead horse, I have a weight issue. My body has an overwhelming urge to be fat. It has been this way my whole life. The good news is when I am fit and exercising I lose weight easy and maintain a very healthy body image. The bad news is I have a terrible back problem that sometimes keeps me from exercising for long periods of time. Now I will say this. I want to be healthy and I want to look good. I have been in very good shape for most of my life. I have had some really bad times though where my weight ballooned up and out of control.

I think about my weight all the time. I want to live a long time. If I go, I want it to be because of old age (or a satellite fell on me). When I was heavy I had very high blood pressure and it was a little scary. My dad died of a stroke at a very young age. That is why I have grown very concerned over the last few weeks of the strange behavior of some people very close to me.

I think my students might be trying to plump me up. Suddenly, there is food everywhere. It started all nice and innocent. A granola bar here, an apple there. "Here Mr. Daley have a bite of this healthy snack". Then suddenly the tide turned. Cookies, candy, treats of all kinds. Not a healthy thing amongst them. Today was the worse. Two students brought cookies, one brought a peanut butter bar, another brought a bag of peanuts and cheetos. All day long I was fighting off the temptations of the offered treats.

I have to be honest. I suspect something nefarious and diabolical. At first I thought my students might be a new strain of zombies. Ones that didn't run around eating everything in sight but took their time savoring their ever enlarging future meals. I tested my theory by putting several pictures of brains up on my smart board. Only one student started drooling. I immediately sent the student to the nurse's office. Let her deal with the zombie eating fiend.

My friend Jennifer thought perhaps it was a Hansel and Gretel situation. I immediately began to worry about witches baking me in the oven. I dismissed this after I took another look at the little munchkins. I knew all my early morning exercise and running would mean they would never be able to catch me.

I don't know what they are up to. Report cards have already come out. Too early to be bribing me. No field trips coming up. I couldn't take it anymore. I asked one of the lovelies why she brought me cookies. She smiled cooly and told me, "I was hoping if I gave you cookies you would stop singing in class." I looked at her in stunned horror. She wasn't fooling me I think they might be cannibals.



Posted by Christopher at 5:28 PM 1 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, Cannibals, Food, Health, Horror, Teaching, Zombies
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Shame On You Cardinal Brady



The part of my job I hate the most is I sometimes have to see the very worst of what some so called humans do to children. In my years of teaching I have been exposed to horrors of depravity so gruesome I went home and cried for a month. I once reported a case of abuse to the child protective services so nasty police were at my school an hour later. If you know anything about how long the wheels of child protective service can sometimes take to turn, than you know how bad this particular incident was.

My students trust me and with this trust comes an incredible responsibility. I am sometimes let into the horrors of their life. It hurts, it makes me angry, it reminds me of my childhood. The anguish I feel when this happens drips down into my heart like a vile poison. I can remember each and everyone of these incidents. They are burned into my brain with a branding iron. My heart breaks into a million pieces and it takes forever to put it back together.

These feelings are not unique to me. I know many people who feel the same way. Who would react the same way. As a teacher I know one of my jobs is to keep my students safe. It is a job I hold most sacred. I can't always do what I really want to do which is rescue them myself but I will not hesitate to turn to the system put in place to protect children. I would never be able to live without myself if I didn't do everything possible to help a child in need.

Which brings me to Cardinal Sean Brady of the Catholic Church in Ireland. Who in 1975 investigated and proved 2 cases of sexual abuse against children. The acts were committed by Rev. Brendan Smyth. Brady reported the findings to his superiors who gave Smyth counseling and continued to let him work around children whom he continued to abuse. Brady never turned over any of his findings to the authorities and now years later claims he was just following orders.

This abusive incident was not an isolated one (as anyone who follows the news knows). In fact the country of Ireland recently released results from an investigation that showed widespread abuse from 1975-2004. Now it looks like they are going to find the same thing in Germany. The USA has already been rocked by this scandal.

This is not about Catholic bashing for me. It is about my complete confusion over how men who were supposed to be the moral compass of their communities failed their children. Not only failed their children but covered it up. They cared more about saving face than saving lives. How did they live with themselves? Where was their humanity? I would have thrown myself off a bridge before I could have let someone continue to harm children.

Cardinal Brady (and anyone else who looked the other way when they knew a child was being harmed) shame on you. You had a responsibility towards those children and failed them. You will have to live with this forever. I hope it torments you until your dying days. I hope your hearts broke into a million pieces just like mine. You should have to face everyone of those children and tell them what you did.

I won't sleep well tonight. It has been one of those weeks. I have a heaviness in my heart which will weigh on me. Sometimes it is hard to get away from the pain this world can cause. When I do finally fall asleep. I will sleep knowing I have never looked the other way and I never will.






Posted by Christopher at 7:26 PM 3 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, U.S. News, World News
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
First Fire All The Congress



Our government can't seem to get shit done right now. Everything has turned into a nightmare of party line politics. The country is hurting. The economy is still in the dumper. The state of California just laid off 22,000 teachers. The ineptitude going on at this very minute is enough to make a grown man cry.

If that isn't bad enough I stumbled across an article this morning about a little spat between Congressman John Campbell & George Miller. Campbell recently introduced a resolution congratulating UC Irvine's men's volleyball team for winning the national championship. Miller attempted to kill the bill by keeping it from a floor vote.

When Campbell confronted Miller he was told this is the consequence for killing my water bill. A water bill that Campbell was only against because Miller didn't back an effort to keep water pumps open in Sacramento.

This is alarming on so many levels. First of all, what the hell are our congressman doing wasting time passing resolutions with no actual benefit to the country. Do we really need a resolution congratulating a sports team? Before you start saying what's the harm, go look how many of those resolutions take up time on the congressional floor. Way more than you would ever imagine. They all have to be voted on. They all have to be written. They all have to be read. It is a complete and total waste of our taxpayer dollars. It is embarrassing.

Then of course there is the deeper problem. The fact that our congress decides on what bills they are going to vote on not based on merit but on scratching each other's back. You vote for my bill I vote for yours. It is another big stinking rotten barrel of pork. You hear about the big fights in the news all the time. National health care, education, military, those issues take up the headlines.

The truth is hundreds of bills get passed with bipartisan support and most of them are completely based on pork barrel politics. Nobody seems to really care about what is good for our country. Only what is good for them. When they don't get what they want they veto bills in retribution. Tuesday, John Campbell put the vengeance smack down on Miller when Miller tried to introduce a resolution about the Maryland men's basketball team. They actually had a debate on the merits of the resolution.

My head hurts just thinking about it. Recently a high school in Rhode Island fired all of their teachers. They say it was because they were a failing school (which they were) but the firings only happened after a breakdown in contract negotiations. They used an out in the No Child Left Behind bill to deliver a beheading to the teachers' union. If you can fire a school full of teachers based on a bill passed by congress than shouldn't we be able to fire congress for failing to do their job. No matter what they might think their job isn't lining the pockets of their constituents or acting like a kindergartner sticking out their tongue when someone makes them mad.



Posted by Christopher at 7:28 PM 1 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, Teaching, U.S. News
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Something is Not Right With Me





Something is not right with me. I have always known this and honestly have taken pride in being just a little bit different. Alright, maybe a lot different. On a scale of 1 to 10 I am sure I fall somewhere on the low end of 7,777 (I like sevens. I am a seventh son. If I believed in Irish superstition I am suppose to be extremely lucky). I wonder sometimes if I let some of my quirky nature interfere a little too much in my everyday life.

I can't seem to sleep normal. I go from being an extremely emotional and creative being to a somewhat emotionless calculating person (although not very often anymore). I let weird things really bother me and then completely look past things which should probably set my insides on fire. I have a million thoughts going on in my head at one time. I go from being very confident to completely sure everything I write is crap. I can't keep a fucking schedule if my life depended on it.

Yet, somehow I have a job that runs by bells and a clock. I get up early in the morning Monday through Friday. I exercise and then go to work. I work hard and come home exhausted. I get my blog out everyday but have been failing miserably at my new book. I often feel like more than one person all wrapped up inside my skin. Sometimes, I am not sure all the people in there like each other. It is a balancing act which wears on me.

It has been a little easier lately. While I am having trouble with the new novel, I did write two books last year. I haven't missed a day writing my blog in over a year and it has given me a lot of confidence in my writing. I have met tons of interesting people on Twitter and through my blog. They have made it feel a little bit more natural being me. I am not constantly at war with myself.

I want to talk about these issues and the emotions. The self esteem problems. The doubt and the lingering pain from my childhood but I have only two real fears left from my childhood, failure and being judged. It makes me hesitant actually talking about what is going on inside the jumbled bumblebee hive which is my head.

I never felt accepted not one damn day of my childhood. I always felt like I was acting. Showing people the person they wanted to see. My family didn't help and it certainly didn't help some random stranger chose me to sexually assault.

Then there is the failure issue. Wow, have I put myself in the corner on that one. Somehow, I have gotten it deeply into my head that I am a failure if I don't make it as a writer. I know why it is there. It was the only thing I ever wanted as a child. It was also a dream which was completely crushed by almost every adult I knew. I remember promising I would prove all of the assholes wrong.

The rational side of my brain knows my life is a big ball of win. I have accomplished much more than I truthfully ever thought I would. The writing thing just keeps hanging out there on the edges, taunting me. I have been working hard to let it go.

I know my new novel has been stalled because I have fallen into my old habit of rewriting and trying to perfect every sentence until I bog completely down. This weekend I reread everything I had so far and realized I really liked it. I then told myself to shut the hell up and start writing the novel again.

I spent a few days letting it swirl around inside my brain and am now ready to go. Back to my old pace, 1000 words a day no matter what. No editing until the end. As for the rest of my mixed-up self. I will keep working at me. I like who I have become. I like who I am becoming. I will never be normal but normal is boring. Now, if I could figure out away to make my brain believe the automatic lock on the car actually works I might be a little less nuts.



Posted by Christopher at 8:06 PM 3 comments Labels:writing, music, books, movies, Childhood, Life, Writing
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About Me

Christopher Daley
Red Bluff, California, United States
I am a school teacher who still wants to be a published writer when I grow up. I think that all children are not the same and any system that treats them that way is broken. Most people think I am not completely right in the head but they have no idea how bad it truly is in there.
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