A.A.A.D.D.

Thank goodness there's a name for this
disorder. Somehow I feel better knowing what it is I have!

 

Recently, I was diagnosed with
A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

 

This is how it manifests:

 

I decide to water my garden. As I turn
on the hose beside the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs
washing.

 

As I start toward the garage, I notice
mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before
I wash the car.

 

I placed my car keys on the table, put
the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is
full.

 

So, I decide to put the bills back on
the table and take out the garbage first.

 

But then I think, since I'm going to
be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage, I may as well pay the bills
first.

 

I take my check book off the table,
and see that there is only one check left.

 

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,
so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi I'd been
drinking.

 

I'm going to look for my checks, but
first I need to push the Pepsi aside so that I don't accidentally knock it
over.

 

The Pepsi is getting warm, and I
decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

 

As I head toward the kitchen with the
Pepsi, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye - they need water.

 

I put the Pepsi on the counter and
discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.

 

I decide I better put them back on my
desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.

 

I set the glasses back down on the
counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

 

I realize that tonight when we go to
watch TV. I'll be looking for the remote. But I will not remember that it's
on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs.
But first I'll water the flowers.

 

I pour some water in the flowers, but
quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

 

So, I set the remote back on the
table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.

 

Then, I head down the hall trying to
remember what I was planning to do.

 

At the end of the day, the car isn't
washed; the bills aren't paid; there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the
counter; the flowers don't have enough water; there is still only one check
in my check book; I can't find the remote; I can't find my glasses and forget
what I did with the car keys. Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got
done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day, and I'm
really tired.

 

I realize this is a serious problem,
and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.