I am an asshole because ...
For so long I have repressed my thoughts. I was taught not to speak. Meet my mom and you will see that after 38 years of marriage and not saying nothing. Now every words she speaks is about something she said nothing about.

I am respectful, I know the time and place but sometimes I feel the need to express what's on my mind. Basically I don't like to complain and wonder. I hear people, women, talk about the same shit over and over. He don't do this or why did he do that. Then why not ask him and stop repressing all the anger? I think some people just like to complain. Plus do men really like when women yell because they are pent up with frustration and anger.

I am an asshole... because I am direct. I try to be coy and often beat around the bush but after awhile there is nothing better than just coming right at it and getting to the point. If I hurt your feelings I don't do it on purpose. I will try to be kind in my approach.

I am an asshole
Because I hate giving my all to a man just to have him use me and abuse me. I am still a very nice person. A great friend that listens to everyone and goes the extra length for anyone I feel is worth it.

But now I am more confident than I have ever been because of some great male friends in my life. After a long-term relationship where I respected my duty to serve and respect my man I soon became worn out because he never cared about me. Then I learned I never cared about me because I was losing myself in taking care of everyone else. I took care of my family by mentally and financially supporting my mom and dad and then supported my best friend as she went through 2 years of relationship problems and lastly I took care of my boyfriend who was extremely dependent and needed me for everything. He didn't want me sexually, could not get the courage up to marry me and then wanted to have children, go figure. Plus his family was racists. Lastly, he was with me for 10 years yet told me he didn't think he was worthy of me.

I am as asshole because for once I like me. For the past four years its been my time to learn about me and define an identify so that when I do get into another relationship I can have my own life and know what makes me happy. So that I can define what I am looking for in a man and be confident in what I want. I am a good woman in all respects because I will do anything for the people I love. I am loyal. But never will I go back to the situation I was in before.

I do like me but with humility... I am not he greatest thing in this world but because I am all that I have got it's me that I love and worship.

I am an assholebecause I am not eager to get married or settle down but I do want to find the right guy. I have come to that point that I am in search of a long-term romance. With that right guy I know that together we would define our lifestyle. Maybe we would have a family but its not a requirement. While the time clock might be ticking I don't think picking a partner should be constrained by that such a biological timeframe. Everything happens as it is supposed to be and those who want badly often get the worst of the evils.

So I will continue with what makes me the happiest. As long as I don't hurt others remaining an asshole might be alright. After all I enjoy meeting and learning from new people as I go through my journey. Over these last 3-4 years I have met the most wondrous people that I never would of met when I was with my ex. I am happy and whoever I choose to spend my life with I want them to compliment that. I want them to enjoy spending time with me on occasion but knowing how to enjoy time with and without me. I want a man I can trust, who is intelligent and open-minded who can tell me straight up. You are an asshole but you are also know the great woman inside ;) there is just something about you!