Last weekend, when I was about to make my usual Saturday morning omelet, a miracle occurred. I'm talking parting of the Red sea, 1969 NY Mets, kind of miracle. Cracking open an egg, what did I see? TWO yolks. Count them..one...two. No my eyes weren't playing tricks on me. I screamed for my wife who was upstairs . When she came down and saw what was in the bowl, she couldn't believe her eyes either. I was flabbergasted. She was dumbfounded. Usually she's just dumb.
My wife immediately placed the two yolks into a zip locked bag to insure my miracle in a bowl would not get lost or be eaten by me. She said I should contact professionals in the science field over my anomalous discovery. That morning I E-mailed letters to the American Medical Association, the American Museum of Natural History, the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics, the Academy for International Sciences and Research and Ripley's Believe It Or Not.
The ramifications of two yolks when it comes to cooking recipes defies the imagination. My wife suggested I contact Betty Crocker, and Pillsbury as well as cooking personalities like Emeril Lagasse, Rachael Ray, and the Frugal Gourmet. I told her that my discovery might create a new genre of movies. I said I'd also contact George Lucas, Steven Spielberg, the Coen Brothers, and Seth MacFarlane. My wife agreed that a double yolk in Jurassic Park or Breakfast at Tiffany's might bring unseen excitement to movie goers
But I thought to myself that this is just the beginning. why not contact the really big guys in the egg industry like Big Bird and Dr. Zeuss and his famous Green Eggs. In addition I decided to contact IHOP, McDonald's,Denny's, Oscar Mayer, Au Bon Pain, England's Best, Hilshire Farms,Swifts Premium, and Kraft and Nestle Food corporations. While I was busy with my own E-mails, my wife was contacting all our local newspapers here in NY as well as major newspapers in other cities. I agreed an egg on one's face should certainly be a topic in the Washington Post.
Well that morning when I first discovered the double yolk, all I had for breakfast was a bowl of Wheaties and a toasted buttered Thomas English muffin. I was afraid to crack open an egg until I was sure my blood pressure went down. The excitement of seeing another miracle in a bowl would probably require my need for a tranquilizer.
So, is it up for bid on Ebay?