Every one of us experiences “loss” in our lives.
The period after which is considered and called “grieving.”
I haven’t read any books or consulted with professionals concerning this matter, but consider myself an expert in this field due to my own personal experiences.
Loss can happen in many areas of our lives from losing a cherished ring, moving away from a best friend, losing a pet, losing a lover, husband, wife – or more life altering, the passing of a loved one.
Be it a child, father, grandmother or mother – someone/something has been removed from our lives.
Sometimes separation can bring on the same effect of absence or loss as well.
Not two people deal with grief exactly the same way so I don’t believe that our recovery efforts/methods can be generalized.
First, it takes time for the facts to sink in.
Then when it does, the hole of emptiness needs to be acknowledged and addressed.
There is nothing that anyone can say or do to heal a broken heart.
Trying to figure out ‘why’ is a natural tendency but futile.
My Mother taught me that everything happens for a reason.
Sometimes (most times) we never live to learn just what that reason is/was.
She also told me that time is a great healer and that concept always infuriated me.
However, I’ve come to learn that she was right.
It isn’t that the hurt or loss is any less great, it just doesn’t seem so sharp or devastating – as time passes.
However, the passage of time doesn’t take away from the importance or impact of the event and there is no time limit to grieving - that's a personal thing.
You never forget.
Time softens the blow.
Only with its help can you gather yourself up and carry on living your life. Like Mum said, 'life is for the living.'
If I sat and thought of all the personal losses in my life, I would be nothing short of an emotional cripple.
But time has eased my pain and sense of loss and I now can look back at most things without feeling that sharp dagger piercing my heart.
Time has helped me accept it all and become a stronger person.
Don’t get me wrong though.
I still have tearful moments about many people, places and things that are no longer part of my life.
I miss them.
But, hey, I’m human after all!
Do what you must to help yourself through life’s tests, challenges, storms and changes.
Be gentle with yourself and remember that behind the storms sky, the sun is shining.
It just takes time for the clouds to clear . . . .