OK...about two months ago I started going to the gym for the first time in my life. Thus far, I am not even close to being hooked. I hear from people who have been going to the gym for years and love it. I always feel worse on the way out, than I do on the way in. Where is the reinvigoration? I joined basically to get some physical activity as I sit at the computer most of the day. Big shocker, I know! I also thought it was a pretty decent way to socialize with other humans. I had heard rumors, but I did not know they actually really existed.

For now, I am being assisted by a cute, early twenty something trainer who's intent (I think) is to make me pass out. So far, it hasn't happened yet, but If she reads this, she will probably step it up a notch! She is actually pretty cool, and as you can imagine I give her a hard time just because that is how I am. Notice I didn't say flirt? It is kind of hard to be effective when I am sweating and about to die because she is having me balance on one foot while the other is wrapped around my head...all the while I am holding weights for like 20 minutes at a time. I am stretching the truth a bit, but you get the idea.

The gym I go to is fairly good sized with hundreds of machines. It also is usually very crowed. One of the annoying things about the gym, is the look of happiness on everyones faces. Why is everyone smiling? I love when I just get on a cardio walker type thingy and my heart instantly rockets to around 130 beats per minute. I then glance over to the guy next to me who is like 60 years old...has been running for 30 minutes, and his heart is a calm 100 bpm. What's with that? Also it is a little unnerving to be working out next to Andre Agassi like I did on Saturday. I think he was impressed with me though. lol!

The gym locker room has also convinced me that I am thoroughly disgusted by men. Not sure what goes on in the women's locker room, but I guess men just love to be naked. From the minute I enter through the door that is always propped open...I am surrounded by naked dudes walking around. It is not like I am trying to go there, and I assure you I am screaming in my head not to make eye contact...but everywhere you turn, another naked guy is bending over doing something. And what is with all the body hair? These people are like little sasquatches. I once unfortunately saw a guy putting deodorant in places I never thought it should go.

Another disturbing thing is that all these people seem to know each other as if they have been going there for years. If that is the case, I want out now! These people are nasty. It is odd that in the gym, it looks like muscle beach. In the locker room, it looks like a nursing home. Who is laughing now, Mr. 60 year old cardio man! :)