I have an opinion on the subject of relationships being a team sport rather than about the individual. This concept seems to be a tad bit different than what others think...no real shocker there. lol! My view of a relationship is that it is teamwork, it is give and take, and it is compromise. Conventional wisdom seems to be in opposition to this. I am sure we have all heard things like "before you are able to find a meaningful relationship, you must first be happy with yourself". I don't really get it.

Now, if someone is on crack or something...well yeah, maybe they need to get their act together first. But for the masses, this is not the case. Here is my take. If your objective is to be in a relationship...don't try to be independent. Because once you are truly independent, self sufficient, and happy...there is no room for anyone else in your life. So, when someone does eventually enter your life, they are more of a disruption. I view a relationship as a puzzle. The whole picture is the relationship, and some of the pieces are you, and some are your partner. No matter how you try to fudge it, you are never going to complete it without all the pieces. If you want to be single though, then it is probably a good idea that you are independent.

In my case, pretty much everything I am doing is to position myself for a relationship. Once I am there, I can further align my life around it. Quite the opposite of most people. Make sense? Probably not! Anyway, over the course of the last year, it is interesting to talk to women about what is going on in their lives. Almost 100% of them all struggle with the same things. Don't get me wrong, men do as well, but historically it was always the man who worried about these type of things. Things such as jobs/careers, living arrangements, bills, going out, etc. My point is not that these exist...it is just that they are now consuming women. They all talk about overcoming these issues first...then they will find a partner. Again, once people are independent, self sufficient, and happy...there is no room for anyone else.

Todays culture is unfortunately geared toward independence. I often hear "I am staying away from men/women for now until I get my act together", or "I am so sick of men/women...blah blah blah". It just seems like no one admits to or even tries relying on others anymore.

I know I will get some flame on this, but I just mean that our society has made it so easy for people to jump ship at the first sign of stress. I am sure it will be taken out of context and turned into how I hate women or something absurd like that. For those of you who are tempted to go there, read my other posts. I think women rock! Also, the point of this post is that IMO, I am only whole with a woman and not on my own...so there is no power trip on my part going on.

Now, I am not saying you should be unhappy if you are single...that is just silly. I am just thinking that we should all not try so hard to be independent first, and then work on a relationship. Once again, I'd love to hear the community's take on this.