OK, after writing my last post, I got to thinking more about my friend Steve and his Steveisms. Steve was my best friend from around sixth grade, to maybe 4-5 years following HS. We were like brothers. I practicality lived at his house after my parents divorced when I was around 12. His mom was very good to me, and I am sure she helped get me thought the teenage years. Steve...youngest of four, was a bit spoiled. Though, the nicest guy...he just was not very motivated. His much older siblings went on to become eye surgeons, microbiologists, and business leaders. Steve was always just content with menial jobs. It drove everyone crazy.

It was cool hanging out over his house all day. We would sit for hours listening to music, writing songs, and pigging out on the food his mom would make us. One of my favorites was when she would come down to his room at yell at him to clean up either the room, or the garage or something. His room was always trashed as you could imagine. I am not sure what ages we were, but it seemed like there was always garbage bags full of empty beer cans just lying around. Things were a lot different back then, and the legal drinking age was 18 anyways. Besides his mom was cool, so we got away with a lot. Anyway, my point was, she would offer Steve like $100 just to clean his room. Steve would always whine about it, and never want to do it. Well, I had different thoughts about that! I would immediately start cleaning so we could get the $100. We would then go out and blow the money at Go Kart tracks, at the mall, or on food or something. I was no fool!

To this day, anyone who knew big Steve (as we used to call him) would get hardy laughs out of some of the things he would say and do. There were countless good times and capers throughout those years, but a few of his antics still makes us scratch our heads. I think there was a bit of insecurity with him though, as sometimes he would just make up some random story and run with it. I was never quite sure why he would have been insecure either...he was a good looking guy, and he was always pretty good with the girls. I was lucky to pickup his scraps. There are some funny stories about that, but we will save those for another time. ;)

Here are a few stories that come to mind...

As most of you know, teenage boys and bodily functions go hand in hand. So, it is probably no shocker to imagine a bunch of 16ish years-old guys sitting around either high-fiving, or mocking each other about such things. One time, while jamming or something, a foul oder presented itself. Through a process of elimination, we turned to Steve and jokingly said "man, did you rip one?" Instead of fessing up like any other teenage boy would, he said in all seriousness, "no, its my breath!". Now wait...who would say that? I mean, who wants that kind of breath? There was no logic to it at all! Funny thing, he used that line on more than one occasion. He was random that way.

Another laugher that to this day is still a mystery, is the famous "ironing incident". One day, while a bunch of us guys were just hanging out is Steve's bedroom, we noticed Steve to be in some mild pain. We also noticed a new prescription lying on the dresser. Curious, we asked "what's with the salve?" After a moment of obvious embarrassment , Steve sheepishly told us the salve was for a burn he had sustained on his Johnson. As you can imagine, we were not going to let that bomb just sit there. We probed deeper! He told us that he was ironing a shirt and he accidentally burned himself. We all looked at each other and said how is that possible? I mean, first off, he would have had to have been naked. Secondly, we all were very familiar with this ironing board, as it was always in his bedroom. I mean, you would have to be standing on your toes, and flop the thing on to it, just get it there. Then what? Even if you accidentally get that far, don't ya' think you are going to be a little cautious with that hot iron? To this day, we have no clue as to what really happened, but it provided countless hours of entertainment.

God, there are so many more stories I could tell. Maybe if I get motivated, I'll share. Steve, if you happen to read this...get a hold of me. We need to catch up! Miss ya' man!