All day yesterday I was having a bad day for no particular reason. It showed up in my poor work, and I was really just down all day.

Then last night I went to one of those marketing survey sessions. It was on shampoo, so I sniffed several different shampoos and talked about how important moisturizing shampoo is for my hair. Sitting across the table was a voluptuos brunette woman. I couldn't help thinking that she was Mike's type. Then my mind wandered into visualizations of him and this woman. Why, I don't know. It really upset me. I hate to admit it, but I still really miss him. I think about him a lot. I know that he wasn't right for me, and that he didn't undertand or accept the real me. However, I still miss him like crazy. What the hell is wrong with me???? I'm still texting and calling the lovely NP, but then why do I miss Mike so much. I have really been fighting the urge to call or text him to see what is going on with his job and living situation. It has been very hard. I just want to reach out to him. Actually, I want him to reach out to me, but I know that will never happen. Once he makes up his mind, I'm pretty sure that he is done. It drives me crazy to think that he could be dating someone else right now. This is really frustrating for me.

On other notes, the recovering alcoholic roommate has been great lately. She cooks and loves it when I eat her food. I've decided to give her a three month lease to see how things go. I have two more people coming over this weekend to look at the third room.

Property taxes are due in November. There's no way in hell that I can afford to pay them. They'll have to go on the home equity line of credit. And the debt circle continues.

I spent all last weekend power washing my deck. I'm desperately trying to get it sealed before the winter. This weekend I have to kill all the mold with bleach water. I recently found out that this is a very important step before sealing the deck. I just hope that we have at least two more nice weekends, so I can get it done!!!