“McCain is still being vilified for referring to Iran-supported terrorists in Iraq as al Qaida, as if the vast majority of Americans care about the distinction between a Sunni and a Shiite terrorist.” —Doug Patton

“Barack Obama was speaking to a Jewish group, and he told them that his name Barack is the same as the Jewish word ‘baruch,’ which means one who’s blessed. Obama had a harder time explaining his middle name, Hussein. Things got quiet there.” —Conan O’Brien

“I’m sure [Barbara Walters is] going to catch plenty of flak from her cronies in the media. Certainly not because she’s using an affair, long over and done with, to hawk her book, and certainly not because Sen. Brooke is a black man, but because... he was, of all things, a Republican.” —Burt Prelutsky

“When the House of Representatives takes up arms against $4 gas by voting 324-84 to sue OPEC, you know that election-year discourse has gone surreal.” —Charles Krauthammer

“I was watching the Big Oil execs testifying before Congress. That was my first mistake... Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz knew the routine: ‘I can’t say that there is evidence that you are manipulating the price, but I believe that you probably are. So prove to me that you are not.’ Had I been in the hapless oil man’s expensive shoes, I’d have answered, ‘Hey, you first. I can’t say that there is evidence that you’re sleeping with barnyard animals, but I believe that you probably are. So prove to me that you are not’.” —Mark Steyn